Meat Bakery Blues

guu

Hong Kong baker, Eduardo Wong, adds a dash of meat to the bread mix

Hong Kong bakeries specialize in soft, limp bread with soft, limp crust. That’s how they like it in Hong Kong. Their bread mirrors the people…soft and limp. Now, because Hong Kong is shallow, superficial and gaudy, Hong Kong bakeries feel the need to dress their bread up in all manner of gimmickry. That’s why the bread available in most bakeries is rarely just bread. It has to be milk bread, butter bread, honey bread, syrup bread, chocolate bread, walnut bread, limp cheese bread, sugar bread, sweet bread, cheese sauce ‘flavour’ bread, sweet topping bread, used-by date mashed fig bread and dick cheese bread. You see, locals need to think they’re getting something special…something fancy. But they’re not.  They’re just getting soft, limp bread with third party gimmickry.

bread-boutique

It’s soft, it’s limp…it’s cheap disgusting crap…and Hong Kong loves it.

Hong Kong bakeries are also experts in the mass production of tasteless, substanceless cakes. Their cakes mirror the people…tasteless and without substance.  Trickery is a fine art, and Hong Kong bakeries are cunning tricksters. They’ve perfected the deceptive art of making cakes that appear inviting and sweet, but that are almost completely devoid of richness and taste. These things are so physically light and vacuous a sheet of paper would tip them on a set of scales. The shameful business practices of Hong Kong bakeries almost defy science. Whipped cream that tastes like air. Icing so plain you’re sure it’s made from starch and water. Butter, sugar, eggs, and flour that somehow combine to create the dull taste of old cardboard. Hong Kongers, of course, lap it all up and kid themselves it’s good because it comes in a special box with a carry string.

hqdefault

An insipid collection of characterless crap

29731large

They look ok, but taste like the gaudy cardboard box they come in

But of all the low down, half-baked, crusty, crummy bakery gimmicks implemented by seedy Hong Kong bakeries, the shrewdest one has to be MEAT BREAD. Like all canny food businesses, Hong Kong bakeries know that Hong Kongers can’t take 5 steps without stuffing some kind of meat down their throats. Any meat. It doesn’t matter. Walking into a Hong Kong bakery is like walking into some kind of meat locker or butcher shop chop-chop room. It’s like being on the slaughter belt of your local abattoir. If it once lived and breathed the air, knew its mother, had eyes, knew love or fear…then you’ll find it in the Hong Kong meat bakery, ground up, dead and stuffed in a glazed bun.

These fuckers will kill anything if they know they can shove it inside 2 cents worth of soft, limp bread for a profit. Ham steak croissant, black liver chicken bread, tuna fish pastry, sausage & cheese flavor bread, shredded pork bread, ham steak croissant, reconstituted ham baguette, tuna fish puff, cheese & turkey bun, meat cocktail roll, literal cocktail roll, flossy pork French stick, ham corn and corn-hole shredded pork bun, frankfurter sausage bread with added frankfurter, crispy sausage bun, pork belly bread, seared pork belly bread, double seared pork belly bread with extra belly, flossy pork salad bun, chicken cartilage roll, turtle gizzard cold remedy bread stick, cow tongue surprise sweet bread with turkey feet shavings, offal toast niblet dip slices, garlic chicken neck baguette, deep fried aspic meat with tendon roll butter melt bread, tiger penis bread balls, chicken tuna pork beef aspic turkey floss neck loaf.

Welcome to the killing floor, where rolling dough goes hand in hand with mincing, grinding, slicing, dicing, bashing, burning, flossing, cutting, stabbing, pressure broiling, stewing, braising, searing and charring as many ill-raised, stone cold terror stricken animals as can possibly be imagined on a daily basis. And the locals LOVE IT. When they ask, ‘have you had your breakfast yet?’…what they mean is…’did you sit on the train like me chewing with your wet saliva strewn mouth wide open totally oblivious to the sheer terror and unmitigated suffering waiting for anyone within eye-shot of your repugnant, wet mouth-full of pork floss sausage bun yet?’ I always say, ‘no’. No I have not. You scum.

tumblr_lfg30xybnv1qdu40c

Is that reconstituted turkey sausage? Is there any other kind of turkey sausage? Hahaha

pork-floss

We put all our swine through a series of real, actual floss pulling machine jaws, designed to inflict maximum pain and suffering. The result? Limp soft bread with pig floss so fine you can use it to polish steel. MMMM MMMMMM!

butcher-bowrington-road-market-hong-kong

Specialist Hong Kong baker, Moses Chan. “They key to great bread is meat.”

20161205_170231

Ham steak bun. Is that ham reconstituted? Of course it’s reconstituted mother fucker! It’s been reconstituted 9 times since last Wednesday 🙂

chicken-floss

Chicken floss bread…it’s really not as bad as it sounds…it’s worse. 

frfrfrfr

It looks bad now…but wait til Winnie Lau’s sitting opposite you on the bus smacking her chops all over it making slapping sounds with her reconstituted sausage saliva mouth chatting loudly into her phone at 7.45am. You’ll think you’ve died and gone to Hong Kong. If you look close enough, you’ll see Winnie actually eat some of the plastic bag around the sausage bun because she’s so profoundly oblivious she has no idea the plastic bag isn’t the reconstituted sausage bun.She simply can’t tell.

20161205_165329

Turkey bun. You’d be a turkey not to buy as many as you can eat before your bus gets you from Tsim Sha Tsui to North Point.

20161205_165301

Crispy sausage bun? Flossy pork? Nice to meat you!

20161205_170208

Tuna ‘fish’ puff labelling prevents people from misguidedly buying tuna ‘pork’ puffs…which are also sensational, but cost a dollar more…and aren’t fish!

stallowner2

Hong Kong baker, Jacky Cheng, gets ready to knead some dough…with a couple of 4 pound ducks.

The Hong Kong bakery is a disgusting den of pastry perversion and degeneracy. These cheap snake oil, sizzle selling merchants prey upon Hong Kong weakness…a penchant for limpness, softness, shallowness and base limbic desire. I can only hope that when Hong Kong fully and magnificently kowtows to China that these crimes against humanity…these meat bakeries…become a thing of the past like the crazy conspiracy theories about mistreatment and mismanagement at the Tiananmen Square ‘Massacre’ and the absurd ‘stories’ about Cultural Revolution genocides. Once China’s firmly behind the wheel, there’ll be no place for shonkiness, artifice or deception in the HK bakery industry, that’s for sure. A baker’s dozen will be a baker’s dozen…and turtle gizzard will be something you drink, not put in a bun. And I’ll never have to look at you maw your way through some disgusting meat pastry product, sloshing it around in your disgusting wide open mouth, stinking up the train, ever again. You oblivious scum.

18473ebe-4422-11e6-b5a0-f2e623e104bf_1280x720

Highly respected baker, Eddy Cheung, sears an infant wild boar alive for his signature dish…seared wild infant boar bread stick. You’re amazing Eddy.

thumb_600

Pig hair & duck floss surprise. Trying to tell pig hair from split duck feather quill is part of the fun and Hong Kongers love it nearly as much as lining up for 3 hours to throw a foam ball into a hole in a box to win a plastic drink bottle.

20161025_162954

This post brought to you by the staggeringly corrupt and felonious Citibank chain…laundering Mexican drug cartel money with the occasional slap on the wrist for over 50 years…and attempting to hoodwink dim-witted fork and spoon operators out of their hard earned cash with blue suitcase trinkets for almost as long.

20161203_091603

This post additionally brought to you by Used Tissue Hill. When tourists ask me where to go for authentic Hong Kong culture…I don’t hesitate. It’s Used Tissue Hill every time. It’s as Hong Kong as sitting on a train with a wide open mouthful of soggy limp disgusting pig giblet bread.

20161218_093642

When you’re done climbing beautiful Used Tissue Hill, take the load off your feet and out of your nose at Mucus Bench…everyone else does!

Advertisements
This entry was posted in Hong Kong. Bookmark the permalink.

114 Responses to Meat Bakery Blues

  1. Buck says:

    Gold. Pure gold.

  2. James says:

    I once tried the “turkey sausage” bun. I knew I shouldn’t but I did. For starters, I couldn’t say whether that shit they top it up with is mayonnaise or a yellowish, gloopy vaginal discharge. The most horrifying, greasy, gooey and tasteless shit I have ever had. Then it was the pork floss bun. That was even worse. Fist bite and I felt like puking. Spat it out of my mouth, threw the rest into the bin and lost my appetite for the rest of the day. Never to be repeated.

  3. Clint says:

    Glorious.

  4. Hot Dog says:

    I am so surprised there is no mention of snake soup or the disembowelment of live animals for the purpose of attracting customers.

  5. Disgusted says:

    Look up ‘nauseating’ in the dictionary and you’ll see a picture of a greedy HK cunt, in a bus or on the MTR, enthusiastically chomping on one of these bakery treats, mouth wide open in hoggish delight.

  6. Michael says:

    Funny because it’s true; but also sad because it iis true

  7. tony m says:

    A first class post. So true and well written. The way you show the connection between the ‘Soft, limp buns’ and the physique and psych of the Chinese is poetic.

  8. die ghost man says:

    Creased my face off reading this in a crammed MTR after work

  9. Buck says:

    These days in such a globalised world, you can buy anything anywhere. But one thing you cant find in HK: good bread and good cake. And to think that when HKers get married, they have the audacity to hand out Maxim cake coupons, to shame you into going to their wedding and giving them a red packet.

    I dunno if you folk have been to a Chinese wedding. But oh mother of God they are boring, elongated events where “Casper and Winnie” are up on a stage with some cheesy background music (“I wanna marry you”) and all the guests, most of whom dont even know the happy couple, are feeding their faces and oblivious to what’s happening on the stage. I’ve made a few mistakes in my time, but the best thing I have ever done is NOT marry a local. Can you imagine some hagged Chinese mother in law moving in and following you round everywhere everyday……

    And don’t get me started on Chinese funerals. BTW, Maxim cakes also make an appearance there. Between the burning of all types of paper shit, and some goons in gowns spitting fire, you stop and eat a Maxim cake. For fuck sake.

  10. Cat's Eye says:

    Perfection.

    I consider these bakeries and the tissues and the spit and (fill in the blank) another form of pollution – eye pollution.

    This place has a lot of pollution.

  11. TVB Chan says:

    Moses Chan!!! HAAHAHAAAAA!!

    Where is Aimee Chan??

  12. Hate Trump Love says:

    i think Donald Trump and his buddies have been reading this blog!!

    “The Chinese … is a despicable, parasitic, brutal, brass-knuckled, crass, callous, amoral, ruthless and totally totalitarian imperialist power that reigns over the world’s leading cancer factory,”

    https://www.theguardian.com/world/2016/dec/22/brutal-amoral-ruthless-cheating-trumps-trade-industrial-peter-navarro-views-on-china

  13. James says:

    I don’t think so. It’s simply the truth.

    “The repressive communist government [is] now victimizing both American and Chinese citizens alike”.

    Agreed.

    “Help defend America and protect your family: don’t buy made in China,”

    Also agreed. I will not (or avoid at all costs) to buy anything which is made in China.

    The cartoon of “Thomas goes to China” portrays exactly how the insidious Chinese scumbags are selling (not selling actually, shoving down our throats) all sorts of substandard and poisonous products. It is definitely time to put a stop on this vicious whorehouse.

  14. Gweilo Beer says:

    There is a beer called Gweilo.

    It’s true!!!

    http://gweilobeer.com/

  15. tony m says:

    Fuck off GuilO beer. I have drunk it, its shit, like the bread here…is that your connection or you just advertising? Where are the hops from? Wheres the barley from…the yeast? Not Shite Idland right? SO… FUCK OFF

  16. Harvey Fugwitz says:

    Of Dudley they wrote… he came chasing opportunity, but stayed for the bread…. hahahaha…. Hong Kong bread…. hahahahaha…. If it once lived and breathed the air, knew its mother, had eyes, knew love or fear… hahahahaha….. oh my sides….

    Hey Dudster, dude, the long silences between posts are killing me man. If I didn’t know any better I’d almost think you had started enjoying yourself in Hong Kong or choked to death on a shrimp ball…. lmao.

    Since it’s Xmas, the most amazing time of the year, I’m gonna put in a request. Do a write-up on Hong Kong women. Not the hags or the bags. I mean the girls. The fuckable ones. I’m especially interested in your take on how some of these yummie adorable little 20somethings end up becoming the wrinkled old angry bags in the flower pint pantaloons cursing and spitting their way through the LV shops on Sundays. I have my own theories on the matter, but I’d like to hear yourtake. Come ooooooooon dude. You’ve gotta have noticed the fuckable ones. Come on Dudster.

    Dare I say it…..? Happy holidays!!! Lolololol…….

  17. Dystopian Chan says:

    to Harvey,

    Hong Kong “is a despicable, parasitic, brutal, brass-knuckled, crass, callous, amoral, and ruthless” prison…

    in other words, it is a dystopian whorehouse with a giant casino in the Central.

    Merry Christmas to you too

  18. Shit, this shit is too fucking funny. The worse part is I’ve come to engage to enjoy these bakery bread buns. I tried Pret today that actually had bakers making nice western crossaints with smooth creamy pizza mozeralla cheese with ham or tomato. Fuck that was amazing. I don’t think I can afford all those calories though man. That’s why Hong Kong bakeries try to reduce sugar and oil. Their prices are cheap too, but you’re right. It’s like chewing some tasteless booger that’s been in your nose for too long with one part that’s hard as shit but a loose end that’s still soft like an elongated amoeba trying to eat the air pollution that you inhale.

  19. Buck says:

    Your last sentence is right up there with some of the foulest prose to be posted in this forum. Keep up the good work, GirlsOwnMeBadly!

  20. Man Fuk Kow says:

    How do these ‘Bakers’ make that vile and sordid meat floss?

    What is it about the Chinese that the animals they consume must first be abused and debased!

  21. Buck says:

    Dudley, your last photo suggests that locals use tissue paper to clear their nose. My observation suggests that is not the case. The locals either snort it back, cover one nostril with a finger and directly blow the little oyster out the other nostril, or just do the good ole finger pick.

  22. Brainless island says:

    Reading this and seeing them east meat floss makes it clear that they will put anything in their mouths…which reminds me of the whole ass licking discussion on this blog a while back…which makes me think this: the locals ‘Males’ probable do it as much as the girls. Remember this when a local thrusts you some ‘food’ at you or dumps in in your rancid bowl with the chopsticks they have just been licking…HORROR

  23. R Burgundy says:

    Agree with Buck. Whatever those tissues are being used for, it isn’t to blow the nose. Just ride the MTR – this time of year is best – and listen to the snorting, sniffling, and honking going on, with not a tissue in sight.

    And speaking of tissues, hiking this time of year is also a treat for those who enjoy seeing a discarded tissue on the ground every two feet, along with the Vita-Soy bottles and wrappers for seafood snacks and kelp candy and anything else the lazy, selfish cunts don’t feel like carrying anymore.

  24. James says:

    On the topic of “If it once lived and breathed the air, knew its mother, had eyes, knew love or fear…then you’ll find it in the Hong Kong meat bakery, ground up, dead and stuffed in a glazed bun.” Let’s see how the elephants, sharks and other furry animals fare for Hongkongers:

    Reuters

    “Daniel Chan, the boss of Lise Carving & Jewellery, one of the 400 or so licensed ivory traders in the city, said the total industry loss would be around HK$1 billion ($128 million).

    ‘My trade will go extinct before elephants go extinct,’ he told Reuters.”

    Oh poor Danny Chan… he must be an inconsolable cunt at the prospective of loosing all his filthy money just to protect some useless elephants in Africa.

    Guardian

    “Shark fin soup: a dangerous delicacy for humans and sharks alike.
    For those who had stopped eating it, the reasons given were a combination of the ethical implications as well as recent evidence showing that a percentage of shark fins assessed from five Chinese cities (including Hong Kong), contained mercury and methylmercury in concentrations high enough to be considered unsafe for human consumption. People who ate it at special occasions saw the dish as an important part of their culture and didn’t want that to be lost, and those who ate it regularly simply saw it as their right to do so, despite being aware of the environmental and potential health impacts.”

    Important part of their culture and don’t want it to be lost? What about the sharks? Oh well, fuck them, once they’re obliterated from our planet they will find some other animal to be next on the extinction list. Chinese culture is obviously a lot more important than useless sharks.

    South China Morning Post

    “The fur flies at fur trade expo at HK exhibition centre as protesters gather.
    Protesters exhibition centre venue accuse industry of animal cruelty.”

    Hong Kong Fur Federation said: “There is no such thing as ‘bloody fur’,” it added. “The Fur Trade and the public stand united in our advocacy for the humane treatment of animals.”

    Yeah, just like the ones who end up in the “humane” Hong Kong bakeries.

  25. We do chicken right says:
  26. HK local says:

    Is this a comedy site? If you’re serious about hating HK this much, just move. We certainly don’t want you here.

  27. Well…no it’s not a comedy site, it’s more…it’s more educational.

  28. Brainless island says:

    I have learned so much from this site. To ‘HK Local’:
    First = fuck off and die
    Second = I am not even based in HK, I used to be, but left. HOWEVER its a shit hole and I like to call it out and cope with my PHWT (Post Hong Wrong Trauma)

  29. Buck says:

    For me, this site is cathartic.

    Off topic, but why cant locals jog normally? Why do they have to jog in some kind of bizarre way: arms shaking, or jogging backwards, or foot-scuffing, or just plain gay-looking like some kind of Olympic walker.

    A bizarre incident this morning: I walked through a swinging door and didn’t hold it open for the Chinese dude about ten metres behind (I don’t hold doors open for dudes, especially filthy doors. I dont touch them). This Chinese dude seems a bit pissed about it and says to me (Gwielo dude) “you’re a typical Hong Konger”. WTF?

  30. Buck says:

    and someone educate me: what is it with bikes having loud speakers on the back playing loud music? That’s just freaky.

  31. James says:

    Brainless island says:
    January 10, 2017 at 7:26 pm

    “Second = I am not even based in HK, I used to be, but left. HOWEVER its a shit hole and I like to call it out and cope with my PHWT (Post Hong Wrong Trauma)”.

    Same here. My experience in that shithole left some very deep scars, and I WILL call it out ‘ad nauseum’ until I fucking vent all the aggravation, disgust, trauma, prejudice (and the ‘casual racism’ against Westerners) suffered in this monumental pile of crap; stuffed with the most disgusting, callous, crass, amoral, parasitic bunch of charlatans, tricksters and racketeers on the planet.

    And also, Brainless island, I saw someone saying here that honkongers genuinely don’t feel shame or remorse. And it’s absolutely true.

  32. Shameless Island says:

    James says:
    January 12, 2017 at 12:52 am

    “Same here. My experience in that shithole left some very deep scars, and I WILL call it out ‘ad nauseum’ until I fucking vent all the aggravation, disgust, trauma, prejudice (and the ‘casual racism’ against Westerners) suffered in this monumental pile of crap;

    At least Westerners can leave and apparently you have. But the poor local kids are trapped here. They are being intellectually, mentally and emotionally abused by their parents, schools and peers everyday with no end in sight.

    “stuffed with the most disgusting, callous, crass, amoral, parasitic bunch of charlatans, tricksters and racketeers on the planet.

    It’s pretty simple: they have no conscience. They are sociopaths who worship dog-eat-dog capitalism. They have the highest IQ in the world (or they think they do) and are willing to work very hard for their own self interest.

    “And also, Brainless island, I saw someone saying here that honkongers genuinely don’t feel shame or remorse. And it’s absolutely true.”

    People who have any sense of shame and decency have already left this place in the 1980s and early 90s after Margaret Thatcher decided to give this place to the Communists in 1984.

  33. James says:

    Shameless Island says:
    January 12, 2017 at 3:34 pm

    “But the poor local kids are trapped here. They are being intellectually, mentally and emotionally abused by their parents, schools and peers everyday with no end in sight.”

    I know it and have seen it with my own eyes time and time again. I feel really sorry for the children. They’re faced with a desperately grim future. What a place… what a fucking place…

  34. A Slave says:

    Hong Kong has the longest working hours in the world: 2606 hours per year, which is 1000 hours more than Paris!!!

    https://www.statista.com/statistics/275497/working-hours-cities/

    Why do Hong Kong love torturing one another so much? Why???

  35. HK Mall Island says:

    they work more hours thanks to that add oil bullshit, most of them are just pretending to work while doing fuck all, they won’t leave unless master has left the property. They’re the worst people to hire, just do whatever they can get away with, Singaporeans are even worse!

  36. Pinketon Wang says:

    ‘You are what you eat, what you eat you are’

    This Western saying is wise: Chinamen are soft and limp like the baked goods described.

  37. Cat's Eye says:

    My husband and I own a fairly large Taiko drum. In the two flats above us we have two pianos (not electric), a flute and a violin. Also, in our walk up, all the residents are learning to do a chorus of slamming doors.

    We’re thinking that, as we get to the end of our lease, we’ll start learning how to play this big, loud drum. Or, should we start sooner?

    HK local on 10/01/17: “Is this a comedy site? If you’re serious about hating HK this much, just move. We certainly don’t want you here.”

    An expat can do all sorts of research and even visit before deciding to move here. However, visiting here and living here are two vastly different experiences for a large percentage of expats. We were told this is (was, maybe never) Asia’s World City”, but when we began living here we realized that couldn’t be further from the truth.

  38. tony m says:

    Start now Cats Eye! Drum some manners into them. I suggest drumming, with your door open, whenever the pianos and flutes kick off.

    I imagine that the pianists and faultists are shit. Fed on baked goods with soft, limp, fingers that cant play.

  39. James says:

    “Faultists” is the best misspelling ever! Hahahahaha… the best ever description of hongkongers: Faultists = Offensive to the senses; revolting. Not picking on you, tony m, but you’ve just come up with a word which is just too fitting… and they are shit alright.

  40. James says:

    Cat’s Eye says:
    January 18, 2017 at 9:07 am

    ‘We were told this is (was, maybe never) “Asia’s World City”, but when we began living here we realized that couldn’t be further from the truth.’

    As a matter of fact nothing can truly prepare you for what is in store for you once you make the mistake of moving to Hong Kong. Reason why this blog is by far the best educational site about Hong Kong on the net.

  41. Anon says:

    Why can’t they make a cake that doesn’t look as if the baker stole Carmen Miranda’s hat collection?

  42. Cat's Eye says:

    Tony m — We are so tempted to start. “I don’t want to work. I want to bang on the drum all day.” I’m dating myself with this song. Yes, I’m an American. Please don’t hurt me.

    James – You’re correct, “…nothing can truly prepare you…” We came out for a visit, talked to people living here and did research online. However, it wasn’t until we were actually living here that it all sank in. One evening when, I thought I would lose my mind, I Googled: Hong Kong sucks, or I hate Hong Kong or some variation and up popped Dudley’s great blog. I really didn’t think much of anything would pop up; was I ever so wrong. It was at that point I realized I wasn’t alone in my thoughts and frustrations. It didn’t take long for me to determine I was in a vortex of sorts sucking the life out of me. Now I refer to it as an assault on the senses.

    Anon – ha, ha, that’s a good one.

    Buck – you inquired about the “…bikes having loud speakers on the back playing loud music?” Maybe no one wants to be alone with their thoughts. They’re so used to the noise pollution and all sorts of other pollution that thinking in a quiet environment would bring them to the realization they are committing emotional suicide. There’s enough of that going around…

  43. SS says:

    Cat’s Eye – Assault on the senses…. I couldn’t have said it better myself.

    HK Local – Let me give you the bottom line. We’re here for the money. We get paid three times the amount here than back home. Putting up with typical HK scum, the pollution and the bullshit local culture is just a small price to pay. You chinks worship anything gweilo. And we’re here to capitalize on it. And don’t you worry, we will leave once we’re done.

  44. The Pimp says:

    SS – “Let me give you the bottom line. We’re here for the money. We get paid three times the amount here than back home. Putting up with typical HK scum, the pollution and the bullshit local culture is just a small price to pay. You chinks worship anything gweilo. And we’re here to capitalize on it. And don’t you worry, we will leave once we’re done.”

    Birds of a feather flock together. Welcome to this whorehouse.

  45. DK says:

    SS – not sure I agree with you about “three times the amount than back home.” I teach English in a shitty language institute here and I get fuck all. But I do enjoy the perks of being a white male in HK. Thanks to past colonial brain washing, the women here are so easy. They just throw themselves at you. So ironically that makes me a whore’s whore perhaps? And the look on the faces of their 90lb-over-protective-weakling-handbag-carrying-whipped-boyfriends is just priceless when I steal their girls right in front of their faces.

    The only downside to banging local girls is their bad breath and BO. Yes, even the hotties. But it’s no biggie. I just put on one of those tried and true standard HK anti-sars N95 face masks. And if her breath really stinks, I put one over her mouth too. Speaking of bad breath, it seems to be an epidemic here. You step on to the MTR or into any elevator packed full of locals chatting and all you can smell is this foul rotting sour stench. Mmmmm. not

  46. Whores without condom says:

    DK, yeah, this place is really disgusting.. The men and women here do not have any sense of shame or decency.

    If you like free whores, you have come to the right place! But you might want to know that in recent years HIV infections are spreading like wild fire in Hong Kong.

    http://www.scmp.com/news/hong-kong/health-environment/article/2011168/number-new-hiv-cases-hong-kong-third-highest

    As for bad breath, did you know that more than 90% of the locals do not use floss their teeth?

  47. James says:

    Fucking hell!!! The stench of their bad breath is enough to gag you!

  48. Anonymous says:

    Been living here for a long time. The people here are without a doubt some of the worst in the fucking universe. They do not think what they are doing is wrong, and worse, do not care. They have no souls! They hide behind their fake culture, which means nothing to normal decent people just trying to get on with things and make it through their day without being fucked with.

    I believe a big reason for their foul behavior is that they do not fear much here, in Hong Kong (other than losing money). I’ve had middle aged women slam into me while walking, who then turn around and begin yelling in my ear. Neighbors who constantly scream and shout in the corridor and slam their door with the same amount of force as a small bomb. People push me in the back while trying to pay a bill at the ATM. I mean, I could write a book of all the bullshit abuse normal folks have to go through living around these Chinese people.

    The point is this – there are no consequences for them to act like the complete cunts that they are. In other developed places you would get smacked around if you behaved this way. This, and the fact that they are evil with no souls is why they act out of line every chance they get, in any place they are and in any situation they are in. Fuck them all! I reckon at least 98% of the population in Hong Kong are psychopaths.

    Without sounding to overly dramatic, us normal people must stick together.

  49. Don't--Just Don't says:

    “So how do we make these people better? We don’t. In fact, treatment makes them worse. Teaching them about empathy doesn’t make them more empathetic. It just teaches them how to fake it better. They see treatment as “finishing school.”

    Psychopaths given counseling were 20% more likely to re-offend.”

    http://www.bakadesuyo.com/2016/10/how-to-deal-with-psychopaths/

  50. Buck says:

    The next dude who plays his video/game loudly on his phone without a headset, in a restaurant or other public space, is going to get his phone smashed. Same goes who the dork drivers who lunge around corners without indicating or even slowing down.

    What are these people thinking?

  51. Dystopian Chan says:

    SS says:
    January 19, 2017 at 12:42 pm

    ” … Let me give you the bottom line. We’re here for the money. We get paid three times the amount here than back home. Putting up with typical HK scum, the pollution and the bullshit local culture is just a small price to pay. You chinks worship anything gweilo. And we’re here to capitalize on it. And don’t you worry, we will leave once we’re done. ”

    Sounds like you are working in the sex industry..

  52. Buck says:

    DC: we are here to get paid and laid, but getting paid and getting laid are two separate issues.

  53. Anna says:

    Anonymous says:
    January 21, 2017 at 3:57 pm

    “I believe a big reason for their foul behavior is that they do not fear much here, in Hong Kong (other than losing money). I’ve had middle aged women slam into me while walking, who then turn around and begin yelling in my ear. Neighbors who constantly scream and shout in the corridor and slam their door with the same amount of force as a small bomb. People push me in the back while trying to pay a bill at the ATM. I mean, I could write a book of all the bullshit abuse normal folks have to go through living around these Chinese people.”

    Donald Trump is right: these fuckers are “despicable, parasitic, brutal, brass-knuckled, crass, callous, amoral, ruthless”..

    https://www.theguardian.com/world/2016/dec/22/brutal-amoral-ruthless-cheating-trumps-trade-industrial-peter-navarro-views-on-china

    They are like the Visitors from the 2009 TV series “V”.

    “The Visitors claim to only need a small amount of Earth’s resources, in exchange for which they will share their advanced technological and medical knowledge. As a small number of humans begin to doubt the sincerity of the seemingly benevolent Visitors, FBI counter-terrorism agent Erica Evans (Elizabeth Mitchell) discovers that the aliens are actually reptilian humanoids wearing pseudo-human skin, have spent decades infiltrating human governments, businesses, and religious institutions, and are now in the final stages of their plan to take over the Earth. ”

    https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/V_(2009_TV_series)#Premise

  54. Brainless island says:

    Cate Eye and Buck – be advised that the police here are racist: Yellow on White or brown = no crime; White or brown on Yellow, even in self defence and self preservation = massive trouble for the whitey or browny. The police, legal system and judges will fuck you over, they will show their true colours as racist fuck wits and shit on you. Please be very careful.

  55. WTF!! says:

    i had some very interesting experience in recent months.

    While I (a male) was taking a leak in the loo, some female workers would mop the floor as if no one was there. This happened a few times in the past few months already in some libraries or shopping malls..

    has anyone else have a similar experience?

    is this normal?

  56. James says:

    Perfectly normal. I used to get annoyed at first… after a while I started turning towards those sacs of shit, shake my dick and sing “I’m too sexy for my trousers”. In some cases they would fuck off and leave me alone in the restroom. They’re fucking idiots. Don’t give a fuck about manners, decency, common sense, etc., and if you (or us) have a problem with this degraded society bereft of any reason, we’re told to fuck off back to our “Western values”. For them our social and family values mean shit.

  57. Cat's Eye says:

    Anna Re: “They are like the Visitors from the 2009 TV series “V”. ”

    If you go farther back…The Twilight Zone episode “To Serve Man” from 1962. “Or more simply stated, the evolution of man. The cycle of going from dust to dessert. The metamorphosis from being the ruler of a planet to an ingredient in someone’s soup.”

    Never the ruler, of course! Sometimes I wish they would end up in boiling soup instead of all the creatures they’re destroying.

  58. Anna says:

    Cat’s Eye, thanks..

    the Visitors are in fact “reptilian humanoids wearing pseudo-human skin, have spent decades infiltrating human governments, businesses, and religious institutions, and are now in the final stages of their plan to take over the Earth.”

    Reptilians are “despicable, parasitic, brutal, brass-knuckled, crass, callous, amoral, ruthless”.

    Male reptilians are cowards; female are whores..

  59. Gary M. Heidnik says:

    Twenty-five percent in Hong Kong reported levels of stress and anxiety—250 times the global average.

    http://thediplomat.com/2016/06/hong-kongs-mental-health-crisis/

    Hong Kong is really one giant mental institution.

  60. Buck says:

    I bet Hong Kong also has the highest percentage of psychiatrists that need to see a psychiatrist.

  61. Mathieson says:

    Chairman Mao is alive. Cultural Revolution will start in Hong Kong this year. I am packing my bags!! Bye..

  62. James says:

    Can you elaborate, Mathieson.

  63. Mathieson says:

    Xi Jinping: China’s New Chairman Mao

    http://time.com/4277504/chinas-chairman/

    Xi Jinping uses “traditional culture” to launch a new Cultural Revolution

    http://www.asianews.it/news-en/Xi-Jinping-uses-traditional-culture-to-launch-a-new-Cultural-Revolution-36661.html

    During the Cultural Revolution, intellectuals were persecuted and tortured publicly on parade. Here’s a clip from “The Last Emperor”

    The truth is this: I just don’t want to be killed… simple…

    chao..

  64. HK Mall Island says:

    “I bet Hong Kong also has the highest percentage of psychiatrists that need to see a psychiatrist.”

    Buck there is not psychiatrist on this island, they are the least useful psy on the planet, your boss are harassing you? great, take panadol and fuck off

  65. James says:

    No shit! There’s nothing on this island and even less across the harbour. The biggest concentration of useless shit, charlatans and scumbags on the planet.

  66. bongowong@anus.com says:

    ‘Classic HK food’ is revolting. Not just the buns, almost all Chinese food is disgusting. Anyone who can afford it eats Japanese or Western

  67. Another Anonymous says:

    Anonymous says:
    January 21, 2017 at 3:57 pm

    “Been living here for a long time. The people here are without a doubt some of the worst in the fucking universe. They do not think what they are doing is wrong, and worse, do not care. They have no souls! … Fuck them all! I reckon at least 98% of the population in Hong Kong are psychopaths.”

    Amen to that.

    some of these fuckers try to pretend to act like humans, but they are in fact reptiles inside.

  68. The Visitors says:

    There is a Wikipedia entry on “Paris syndrome”. It is defined as “a transient psychological disorder exhibited by some individuals when visiting or vacationing to Paris, as a result of extreme shock resulting from their finding out that Paris is not what they had expected it to be. It is characterized by a number of psychiatric symptoms such as acute delusional states, hallucinations, feelings of persecution (perceptions of being a victim of prejudice, aggression, or hostility from others), derealization, depersonalization, anxiety, and also psychosomatic manifestations such as dizziness, tachycardia, sweating, and others, such as vomiting.”

    https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Paris_syndrome

    Should we have an entry for “Hong Kong syndrome”.

  69. Cat's Eye says:

    Yes, there should be an entry for “Hong Kong syndrome”. Could be any interesting discussion…

    The powers that be of Discovery Bay have decided that the community needs an ice skating rink!
    Who needs the Eiffel Tower?

    Just a few more months and I can escape this place; DB, not HK yet, but my sentence is slowly coming to an end. Sometimes it really does feel like a sentence. Does it feel that way for anyone else?

  70. Tony M says:

    It is a sentence here. A real problem is if you start to think ‘This is great, I can brunch! The schools are not so bad, all the parents say so, I can shop, I can compare notes on places, things and people…’ that are SHIT

    This is when it is time to get out, then or if you have saved enough.

  71. James says:

    It definitely felt that way for me. 4 excruciating and miserable years. I wish I had come across this blog before making the decision of exposing myself to this colossal pile of shit of a society. I would have thought 100 times over before getting on that goddamned plane to Hong Kong. Dudley, keep this site alive. The educational purpose of this blog is of utmost importance. Hong Kong projects a completely false image to the outside world. If people read this blog and still decide to try it out, they will be doing so at the risk of losing their sanity, so… suit yourselves. Is it still worth taking this plunge for the sake of money? Fuck no, no and NO! If making money is more important than basic values and peace of mind, then people will deserve the monumental amount of crap which will come their way (on a fucking daily basis). I cannot find words to describe the relief of making my way to HK International Airport for the very last time.

  72. James says:

    Just a note to you guys who are still enduring this shit to make money. I am not judging, attacking or rebuking you for wanting to save money for a better life back home, but in my personal experience I came to learn that doesn’t matter much money you make in this shithole, life and peace of mind are invaluable.

  73. Cat's Eye says:

    Agreed. I am one of the many trailing spouses who wholeheartedly agreed to come to HK for the potential adventure and to shovel cash into savings for retirement. I left behind my own career to come here.

    I thought I had done my homework through research and actually speaking to expats currently living here. Sometimes I feel as if I’m losing my mind. So, I try to get out every couple of months.

    But, you’re correct, the money doesn’t make up for peace of mind. Even with the myriad of problems in my home country I would rather be there. I just have to keep reminding myself that there is an end.

    Dudley, please give us another post.

    “There’s no place like home. There’s no place like home.” Where are my ruby slippers?

  74. Whilst you are still here. says:

    http://www.wikihow.com/Deal-with-Being-in-Prison

    Surviving Prison Life:

    Part 1: Surviving Prison Life – Gain a new instinct for danger, Respect other inmates

    Part 2: Maintaining Your Health.. Exercise regularly..Keep busy with activities

    Part 3: Staying Sane.. Read to empower your mind.. Deal with depression…

    “Prison is certainly not the ideal place for anybody and having to spend any part of your life there is depressing. Moreover, most prisons are overcrowded, full of boredom and disappointment, and sexual predators providing an environment conducive to depression. In prison, you may or may not have access to a doctor, counselor, and drugs.

    If you do not have access to mental health care, try to find another prisoner willing to listen. Odds are there are many other prisoners like you suffering from a depressed mind.

    Try to focus on stressing your body through exercise rather than on your mind. Exercise releases hormones that help fight stress and depression.

    Stay away from drugs and alcohol since they will only make depression worse.
    Concentrate on eating more fruits and vegetables while limiting caffeine and sugar.
    Make a few acquaintances so that you do not spend too much time alone. Maybe your prison mates will be able to give you positive encouragement and lift your spirits.

    Manage your anger

    “Going to prison will make the best of us angry. Anger is common in prison because there always seems to be more frustration than solutions. Thus, when the anger becomes too much and you explode, that is when major problems occur.
    – Be careful not to assume. Making assumptions in prison can be a dangerous road to go down. Never try to be a mind reader. Instead, make sure you know the reason why somebody bumped into you or passed you in line. A mistake could be fatal.
    – Do not impose your own rules on other inmates without their knowledge. This is usually manifests itself in statements that start like this: “He should have…”
    – Many prisoners claim personal rights that must be respected by others. If you violate their imaginary rights, then you must be prepared to defend yourself.
    – The more you “overgeneralize” something the angrier you will become. For example, if you catch yourself constantly complaining that you are “always” singled out or “never” taken seriously, you will likely become angrier.
    – Try not to think about everything as either black or white. In prison, you will survive longer if you understand that there are shades of grey. Not all people are only good or bad.”

    Part 4: Learning the Code – Do not trust anybody, Hide your emotions, Do not stare

    Part 5 : Communicating With Your Family – Write letters and make phone calls,

  75. tony m says:

    James, I agree with your sentiment, but come clean: you still live here.

    I can explain the many slips n tells in what you write that make it easy to see, but ain’t got the time nor energy. Just calling you out cos I don’t like phoeys.

  76. James says:

    tony m, I don’t… but in a way still I do. I won’t go into that. I’m not a phooey, I have experienced first hand what probably most of you expats never really have – living in your own little bubbles (e.g. DB and places alike). I should just forget the whole freaking nightmare, put it behind and never ever even open this site again. But I still have the urge to channel my anger through this blog… until I find my inner peace and balance again. All the irony and tongue-in-cheek of Dudley are very amusing and entertaining, while giving a very good insight of the deeply disturbing society this is. But there’s an even more deeply disturbing psychological effect to this than what this blog actually describes, which leaves very deep mental scars (depending on the degree of exposure to this you’ve been subject to). I have tasted a lot more shit than I have bargained for in this horrifying mind game called HK… but you’re right, I should just let it go, leave it behind once and for all and wish you guys good luck, and a safe return home when time is right, whatever walks of life you’re from.

  77. tony m says:

    Sorry fella. Did not realise that.

    As a note, with 2 kids and dignified life my monthly outgoings are > HKD $120,000 pcm. Not sure how ideal this place is for saving up loads of money as described by multiple posters? Maybe if you ain’t got kids.

  78. Cat's Eye says:

    DB is no picnic either and the people here can be absolutely horrible. DB is NOT Hong Kong.

    Several years ago we started in Mid-levels/Sai Ying Pun next to the MTR being built. We had an opportunity to rent a roomy ground floor flat with a large garden in DB so we jumped at the chance due to the rental price and the fact we have a dog. Due to a variety of circumstances we’re still here, but we’re on the downhill slide to escape and we’re considering a number of different areas.

    tony m: Yes, you’re correct it’s much easier to save when you don’t have kids here or employ a full-time/part-time helper. Our son is grown and we were fortunate he was able to earn scholarships and grants while working at a university lab.

    James: “But there’s an even more deeply disturbing psychological effect to this than what this blog actually describes…” Correct.

    Whilst you are still here: Good post. I must constantly monitor and modify my behavior. As I noted in a previous post, there are some decent people here. It’s so easy to do, but I cannot paint a wide brush to cover everyone. It’s not right.

  79. James says:

    tony m, I’m very suspicious when folks keep on bragging about the “fortunes” they save in Hong Kong. The whole system is build on quite the opposite – to prevent you from saving, especially if you’re Western – sucking up your money and your life. Not much gain in that apart from a very bitter taste of a new venture which turns up an experience to be forgotten. You can live quite decently with two kids on a lot less than that in the West. I left Hong Kong a while back, but this nightmare still haunts me. I’ll get over this.

    Cat’s eye, I’ve been to DB a couple of times, and to be honest I found the place ridiculous. Can’t get more shallow and delusional than that, and with a prize – a bunch of Chinese lunatics going all touristic-like to watch how we gweilos are getting on in our “HK ghetto”. It’s like a circus of horrors to me.

    Despite making decent money, I kept on being virtually squeezed towards the borders with the mainland because of ridiculously abusive (yearly) rental increases (and with the Chinese there’s no negotiation – “pay money” or fuck off!) So I did, quite in a rush because there was no more point in trying to recover my losses. So I eventually said: “Fuck money, fuck HK and fuck the amoral, blood sucking Chinese”, sold everything in a rush and escaped (virtually). Best thing I have ever done in my life.

  80. London Not Sucks says:

    hey, James, other gweiloos and everyone who is trying to pretend to be gweiloo,

    are you guys returning to London? great place, isn’t it…

    i am sure you can find a good job doing counter-terrorism work there.

    excellent prospect.. i am sure you can save a lot more money there..

    you won’t be missed here.. bye.

  81. James says:

    London Not Sucks, go fuck yourself you stinky piece of shit. Sure I won’t be missed by a bunch of shit-for-brains, useless scumbags.. and I don’t miss that gigantic turd of yours for sure. London IS a great place – if it wasn’t for pieces of shit like you fucking the place up.. bye.

  82. Tony M says:

    London Not Sucks…WOW the half-brain thinks we are all from London, let alone UK!

    I think I hate HK a little bit more now.

  83. London Not Sucks says:

    Tony M,

    did you say you are from Botswana? or was it Pakistan? can’t remember.. sorry..

    anyway, you are welcome here in Hong Kong…

  84. tony m says:

    Wow…half a brain and racist too. What a shithole.

  85. London is Great, Not Sucks says:

    James,

    Counter-terrorism is a rapidly expanding industry in the UK and other so-called “Western” countries. Excellent career prospect.

    You can be an agent infiltrating ISIS in Iraq or Syria. It pays well (you can save a lot more money there, you know). Besides, you had four years of experience in working with and making money from the people you fucking hated. And you obviously are pretty good at pretending you liked them. You are perfect for the job.

    C’mon, James. You can’t find a job cleaning toilet back home anyway.

  86. James says:

    Half brain, racist, impertinent and downright pestiferous. You represent everything that is abhorrent… I nearly forgot… from the shithole, of course.

  87. James says:

    Tony M, they will never get over the fact that they were subdued by the British, who wiped their asses with it (HK). Even more by the fact that the British don’t give a fuck about them any more… therefore everyone who is a gweilo is from London. Now they must all be glued to the news waiting for the death toll from the recent Westminster attack to rise.

  88. London is Great, Not Sucks says:

    James,

    Can you not repeat yourself please? or rehash what others have said ad nauseam? it’s very boring.

    You failed at home. You obviously failed in Hong Kong.

    You need to change wherever you are now.

  89. James says:

    Yap yap yap… Want attention for yourself, dick? Up yours.

  90. James says:

    Oh yes, I did fail in Hong Kong… failed to take crap from crass and callous idiots, such as yourself.

  91. James says:

    By the way, I am from Pakistan. Am I not welcome in Hong Kong? You racist cunt!

  92. Abdul says:

    This troll is a sissy called who used to call himself Guilo Suck. Ignore him, or enjoy him as the villain like in pantomime. He is a laughable half breed.

    Either way, 7 million Chinese each with 1/2 a brain don’t make 3.5 million brains = it means total idiocy.

  93. What a Ride!! says:

    what a ride!!!

  94. Turning Local says:

    you know you are turning local when you see a stampede your first reactions are:

    (1) “Let’s take a video”
    (2) “How do I start a facebook live stream??”
    (3) “I am going to help that pretty girl”
    (4) “That looks like fun.”
    (5) Continue shopping

  95. James says:

    Abdul says:
    March 25, 2017 at 3:36 pm
    “7 million Chinese each with 1/2 a brain don’t make 3.5 million brains = it means total idiocy.”

    1/2 a brain? You’re too generous. I’d divide it by a factor of 1/100 of a brain, which would give no more than 70,000 brains. That’s more realistic.

  96. HK Mall Island says:

    yep that’s definitely Gweilosuck back here. He’s from Finland so give him a break, they’re from north of wall, complete fucktards who would even find Chernobyl more appealing than their home town.
    HK is a shithole, not only locals are fucking cunts, expats are twats. They all think they made it and have the high life now, banging some locals who would take it in the ass for a Luis Vuitton bag.
    I first arrived there thinking it was a great place to live, to realize they are all racist fuckers with the personality of a dead moth. Look at the girls here who would change their name to Japanese names, they all want to be from Japan or Korea as they don’t have half the personality to build their own culture.
    Everytime I see locals interact with other people it is like a mix of kids with down syndrome and asperger. Zero ability to cope with social environment beyond their phone.
    I am going to leave this place for good soon, I can’t wait to not see this shithole again. Fuckers

  97. James says:

    HK Mall Island says:
    April 8, 2017 at 1:18 pm
    “He’s from Finland so give him a break, they’re from north of wall, complete fucktards who would even find Chernobyl more appealing than their home town.”
    Haha… Brilliant!
    All the best for your move, HK Mall Island. I am sure the sense of relief you’ll feel when you step into that fucking airport for the last time will be beyond words. I know the feeling myself.

  98. Finnish Asperger says:

    HK Mall Island says:
    April 8, 2017 at 1:18 pm
    “…
    HK is a shithole, not only locals are fucking cunts, expats are twats. They all think they made it and have the high life now, banging some locals who would take it in the ass for a Luis Vuitton bag.
    I first arrived there thinking it was a great place to live, to realize they are all racist fuckers with the personality of a dead moth. Look at the girls here who would change their name to Japanese names, they all want to be from Japan or Korea as they don’t have half the personality to build their own culture.
    …”
    In most Chinese, Korean and Japanese societies, it is a source of great shame if your daughter or sister is having a relationship with a gweiloo.
    But here in Hong Kong, no one gives a fuck.

  99. James says:

    In the West, it is a source of great shame to be openly racist, whereas it is widely acceptable to be a racist cunt in Asian cultures. It may appear that no one gives a fuck in Hong Kong, but they are downright racist fuckers. They’re either too coward, or opportunistic enough to demonstrate it, like it is in Korea or Japan. Instead, they will try to find a way to get some financial gain out of that relationship. In order get something out of a relationship they find abhorrent, hongkongers are ready and willing to do anything for some kind of financial gain, even if that means disguising their utter racism. When they realize there’s not much financial gain in that, then they will show their true racist colours. Same fucking shit, but disguised as “Asia’s World City”.

  100. HK Mall Island says:

    Have you guys read the article where they fined this helper for eating their boss meatballs? This is hilarious, the boss is a barrister, you would think she can afford to get over the meatball loss but no. She took money off her salary and then went all the way to court. Talking about their stupid Face system. They’re just complete racists morons with zero emotion. It’s like they got the idea of Equlibrium after walking in Hong Kong!
    You should read how all the locals are offended with this blog on Reddit, they’re all crying. Libtards.

  101. Anonymous says:

    Of course the locals are offended with this blog. It is unmasking their fucking shit face culture. Whether they actually know how fucking shit they are, I don’t know, but they certainly don’t like the truth, conveyed in a hilarious way. Their sense of humor equates to a pile of turds near ICC. Shame they were removed, that was a genius way to mirror this fucking shithole. They like twats like that Gweilo Sucks, who thrives on validating this monumental pile of shit.

  102. Walking Silage Heap says:

    Who prosecutes someone for eating HK$100-worth of fucking meatballs? The case should have been thrown out of court.
    It says a lot about this society’s values. Disgraceful.

  103. Anonymous says:

    Poor lady. Life ruined because she ate some meatballs. Not only did her boss deduct her pay, she was fined $800 dollars by the court. She will have to leave Hong Kong as she will never be able to gain employment here again now that she has a crimal record (for eating some meatballs). The chinese are sick fuckers. It doesn’t matter where they are from or if they are abc, bbc, etc. They are all sick rotten people. My question is this…
    Why are they like this? Are the born sick?
    Can someone who knows what they are talking about answer this question seriously. Why are they like this? I would love to know. And “culture” is not the answer I am looking for. There has to be a deeper reason just why they are so evil and cold.

  104. Kublai Khan says:

    Anonymous says:
    April 10, 2017 at 3:16 pm
    “The chinese are sick fuckers. It doesn’t matter where they are from or if they are abc, bbc, etc. They are all sick rotten people. My question is this…
    Why are they like this? Are the born sick?
    Can someone who knows what they are talking about answer this question seriously. Why are they like this? I would love to know. And “culture” is not the answer I am looking for. There has to be a deeper reason just why they are so evil and cold.”
    I think one theory is the Mongol invasion of Song dynasty. (BTW, the last two emperors of the Song dynasty died in Hong Kong (Mui Wo, Lantau Island) in 1278 and Jiangmen (near Macau) in 1279.)
    The Mongol army was one of the most ruthless killing machine in the history of mankind. The Chinese civilisation and the entire educated gentry were basically wiped out by the Mongols. (Most educated people and officials committed mass suicide, if haven’t been killed already.) Dark Ages of China began and continues to the present day. Since then, the Chinese became “despicable, parasitic, brutal, brass-knuckled, crass, callous, amoral, ruthless,” etc like Donald Trump’s people says.
    Of course, Chairman Mao did his part, but the Mongols did the most damage.
    The Mongols did try to invade Japan twice, but failed on both occasions. Had they succeeded, Japan would have been like China today.

  105. HK Mall Island says:

    I think they are completely fucked because Mao wiped out their cultural hard drive. The ones who escaped for HK were just the cream of the cream of greedy fuckers. That’s how you get a culture of people who would rather destroy someone’s life than losing on slurping some delicious meatbarrrr. Also where the fuck you find meatballs that cost 100HKD, were they just the balls of some endangered species that is supposed to make you horny and give you great power? I know that’s a past time here to eat stupid shit to get a boner, what’s the point when you have a tooth pick penis?
    Anyway back to my thesis on Chinaman culture. If you look at Taiwan they have kept their culture and are actually nice people, most of the Taiwanese I met were pretty nice and the girls cute and very humble (even they’re ten times hotter than the hollibrreee locals).
    So your culture is a bit like a compass by which people use as a reference to grow their personality. If you are from the US you will have an unconditional inclination in buying guns and eating burgers. The Brits will have a beer magnet… Anyway in HK there is nothing like this, so they all evolve by doing what they see around them. Your neighbour banged the door once at 5am? sure, let’s do the same all day long! You think a moron waving an umbrella at the police, fuck let’s do it so I can post my selfie on faceboookkk.
    They are just copying what they see but will take it to the extreme. A proof their GPS is broken is that they are completely unable to walk a straight line in the street or stop bumping into each other.
    Where do you think they got this Umbrella movement from? They saw how efficient were people stabbing people with Umbrella when it rains, so the first and only weapon that came to mind was UMBRELLA!
    That is the easiest place to do marketing, just give Andy Lau a Luis Vuitton bag, they will all buy one even though it’s for girls!
    I remember when Pokemon Go was out, every single person was playing it. I saw people run in central like complete retards because of ChingChongator appeared in Central.
    DUN STEAR OUL MEATBARRRRRSSS!!

  106. James says:

    That’s a day-to-day description of their crass and vicious demeanor. It’s pathetic. But underneath that there’s an inbred sense of superiority over other peoples and races. They will never “be in agleeing” that they’re nothing more than imitation monkeys of the lowest order, and that their self-critical sense is zero. As far as they are concerned, if you think they’re crass, amoral, ruthless, parasitic, brass-knuckled, etc., you should leave this place because you do not fit into their “culture”. They’re desperately envious of other cultures, as well as utterly bigoted. They don’t know who or what they are, and yet truly believe they’re superior in every way and form to other people. The catch is that they’re utterly incompetent, sordid and poltroon, but do not believe so, and created a “fake racial/financial culture” to hang on to. Their asses can be kicked by anyone with half a brain, however, they’re taking advantage of this momentary economical power over “lesser” people, such as those Filipino or Indonesian ladies, to assert themselves by humiliating them at every opportunity. It will backlash. It has to. When it does, I hope it comes with an almighty bang.

  107. Anonymous says:

    James says:
    March 21, 2017 at 9:20 am
    “tony m, I don’t… but in a way still I do. I won’t go into that. I’m not a phooey, I have experienced first hand what probably most of you expats never really have – living in your own little bubbles (e.g. DB and places alike). I should just forget the whole freaking nightmare, put it behind and never ever even open this site again. But I still have the urge to channel my anger through this blog… until I find my inner peace and balance again. All the irony and tongue-in-cheek of Dudley are very amusing and entertaining, while giving a very good insight of the deeply disturbing society this is. But there’s an even more deeply disturbing psychological effect to this than what this blog actually describes, which leaves very deep mental scars (depending on the degree of exposure to this you’ve been subject to). I have tasted a lot more shit than I have bargained for in this horrifying mind game called HK…”
    Can you share with us some of your first hand experiences, which most expats never have?

  108. James says:

    Sorry Anon, the answer is no. If you want to find out more, find it for yourself. What’s in this blog already gives a very broad perspective.

  109. Dystopian Chan says:

    http://www.scmp.com/news/hong-kong/health-environment/article/1989904/hong-kong-among-worlds-worst-organ-donations
    Why do Hong Kong have the lowest organ donation rate in the world? is it because people here are:
    (a) despicable
    (b) parasitic
    (c) brutal
    (d) brass-knuckled
    (e) crass
    (f) callous
    (g) amoral
    (h) ruthless
    (i) all of the above

  110. HK Mall Island says:

    they also don’t give organ cause they are all so small it wouldn’t work on adults!

  111. Cunning Sham says:

    it seems Hong Kong people are the only ones who don’t feel any shame in taking photos of others in pain and suffering.
    https://www.theguardian.com/cities/2017/apr/10/dont-worry-i-wont-kill-you-the-strange-boom-in-homeless-tourism

  112. Anonymous says:

    Dear god, a Guardian reader. Cant wait till that paper finally dies.

  113. the_travelling_trini says:

    Oh my god… this is the funniest thing I’ve read in a long time. Thanks for a good laugh! Hong Kong bakeries definitely suck pork-floss ass!

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s