Major Upset at 2016 WWLC Championships

Oh doctor!! In what experts are calling the biggest local news story of the past 150 years, Hong Kong based terror language Cantonese, affectionately known locally as ‘the language of spite and hate’, has been toppled for the crown in Saturday’s 2016 WWLC knockout series finals in downtown Sham Shui Po, Hong Kong.


Beautiful downtown Sham Shui Po played host to this years WWLC

The stunning upset marks the first time in the history of the WWLC that Cantonese has relinquished the coveted top spot to any of the world’s competing horrific languages. According to WWLC historian and statistician, Chan Chun Lin Jr, records date back as far as the first Opium War (1839) when visiting British Warlord and drug dealer, Admiral Wetherby J Snotsberry took time out from routine British East India Company funded merciless unarmed civilian bombing campaigns to note in his journal: “I’m not sure what’s more heinous and objectionable…the unintelligible blood curdling death screams of shrapnel riddled Chinese peasants writhing in agony under the hard rain of our military superiority and newly wrought technology, or the diabolical and equally unintelligible cackling of the as yet, un-wounded, fleeing for their miserable lives down dingy coastal town alley ways, shouting desperate warnings to their Chinese kin while straw huts and rice paddies explode all around them.” – A J Snotsberry, 1840.


Brave British troops subdue hopelessly out-gunned sandal wearing goldfish tenders in devastatingly merciless rout


‘See this cutlass? You keep beakin’ like that, you’ll taste its steel my friend.’ – A J Snotsberry

The following year, the Right Honourable A J Snotsberry went on to found and inaugurate the very first World’s Worst Language Championship, comfortably won by Team Cantonese, heralding an unsurpassed 175 year run as world’s worst language.


Britain…slinging product for centuries.


Grateful customers kick back with a whole lot of sweet, sweet ‘Chinese Molasses’

For generations, Cantonese has reigned supreme as the undisputed world’s worst language, fending off stiff competition from the likes of Hindi, French, Arabic, Spanish, Korean, English, ABC Southern Californian English and Putonghua. It has consistently swept nearly all 10 categories since the ‘defined category’ system was implemented under WWLC rule reforms in 1938…rules that sought to even the paying field and allow competing languages the opportunity to joust in individual disciplines. But the ’38 reforms did little to loosen the savage grip Cantonese held on the trophy…nothing it seemed, could compete with the unsettling, snarling, bitter tones of the repellent men and women of Cantonese stronghold, Hong Kong. Until now.

Amid chaotic scenes on Saturday afternoon in picturesque downtown Sham Shui Po, it was Tagalog to take the crown.


Tagalog is an Austronesian language spoken by up to 60 million people of the Philippines. In its standardised form, Tagalog (or simply Filipino) is a devastatingly nauseating language once considered by the US military for use in enhanced interrogation techniques along with waterboarding, binding in contorted stress positions, sleep deprivation, food deprivation and subjection to extremes of heat and cold. In July 2007, the European Court of Human Rights formally ruled that prolonged exposure to Tagalog was torture and condemned its use by intelligence agencies and military organisations around the world.


Waterboard me…the rack…bamboo up the fingernails…anything but the Tagalog…not the Tagalog!!


Tagalog time…it’s Tagalicious!

Over the last 10 years, Tagalog has enjoyed success and kudos but never the title in the WWL World Championship Finals. Jubilant Philippines President, Rodrigo ‘Rody the Vigilante’ Roa Duterte praised the 2016 win as the ‘sweetest moment’ in Philippine history since his notorious implementation of the Davao Death Squads in 1998. ‘We really stood up this year and showed the world that not only are we number one in vigilante fuelled summary execution crime, but we’re the world’s worst language too…it doesn’t get any better than that!’ – ‘Rody the Vigilante’ Duterte.


Ready to negotiate…Philippine President Duterte

In the lead up to this years championships, few gave Tagalog much hope. ‘A lot of people have this misconception that Filipinos are simple, laid-back coconut collectors with an easy drawl and unflappable nature, ready to freshen your tropical gin and tonic while you  sit back and survey your plantation from the cool, cool shade of your imported treated oak veranda. Well, you know…when we aren’t out in broad daylight, brandishing handguns, homemade knives and 2 foot long machetes, whacking suspected drug users in street-side cafes and movie ticket box queues, that’s pretty much true. But this year was different. Team Tagalog meant business this year.’ – Nic Salonga, Team Tagalog Masseuse.

Turning tradition on its head, 2016 was the first year a competitive Tagalog team was selected from outside of more familiar recruiting grounds such as the corrupt, grime smeared streets of Manilla, the compound armed guarded shopping malls of Cebu and the deadly streets of Davao.


Wish you were here…postcards from Manilla


Duterte’s Death Squads strike again. It’s kind of like that ‘3 strikes you’re out policy’…but you don’t get any strikes.


Duterte’s Death Squad puts the stomp on another evil doer. This time a suspected marijuana user. ‘We heard from a man who said he knew the dead man’s cousin’s wife’s friend’s workmate’s sister…well apparently she used to work in a fish processing plant with someone’s aunty’s best friend who told her boyfriend’s mother that this guy was a pot smoker. Well, that was good enough for us so we gunned the sucker down in front of a second hand shoe sale in southern Davao. He won’t be passing any more Dutchies to the left hand side, that’s for sure.’ – Larry, Duterte’s Death Squad Spokesman.

‘Don’t get me wrong. These areas are goldmines. Some of the spoken language coming out of those centres is world class. I mean, it will sear the ears off a bronze statue. It’ll have you curled into the fetal position in seconds, crying for it to stop. But, you know, when you’re competing against Cantonese there’s just no shortcuts. You need something special and there’s no way around it. It’s just that bad. Cantonese is fucking horrific. We’ve come so close in recent years and in the end it was just a bit of sideways thinking that pushed us over the line this year. Just a great team effort. I’m proud of them all.’ Isidro del Pradoso, Head Coach, Team Tagalog.


…and inflict it on anyone within earshot for that day…lots of catching up to do with only one day a week a free slave…and that means Tagalog at a thousand miles an hour, lots of clicking and popping and rolling clacking tongues that never seem to shut the fuck up.

Pradoso explains that the 2016 Tagalog team was made up of randomly selected, Hong Kong based Filipino maids. ‘I don’t know if you’ve ever been in the same space as a bunch of Filipino maids in Hong Kong for more than a few minutes at a time…maybe on the MTR, a bus or a cramped staircase or something…but they’re incessant. I mean, I’m a pacifist and a Filipino myself…and I was nearly driven clinically insane last Easter when I visited Hong Kong on a 3 day business trip. I was ready to kill every last human being…man, woman and child on that train just to make a single Filipino woman stop beaking into her phone. Luckily, as I was pulling out my concealed machete, it dawned on me…if one Filipino maid can drive a guy like me to the point of literal mass murder, imagine what a group of them…together…all jabbering at the same time must be like. It was a real light-bulb in the head moment for me.

But, I don’t know what to put their stupendously aggravating jibber jabber down to though. It must be something to do with living and working as a maid in this vacuous, desperately callous Hong Kong milieu. It gives an edge to the voice, like no other place, a desperation…some kind of blaring ignorance maybe. From what I saw, Filipino maids certainly have absolutely no regard for other people in any way shape or form. They just don’t care. It’s like they take a huge deep breath, hold it for a second…and then unleash this highly irritating torrent of flipping, flopping, clicking, clacking, rolling, wobbling noise that never seems to end. Now, if you’re the type of mindless cretin who can sit there in an enclosed, crowded public space, stone cold, and yell and scream into your phone or carry out these teeth rattlingly loud, selfish conversations with your ignorant chums, without the slightest consideration for other people, then hey, the WWLC is for you. You see, in the WWLC, you need that kind of obliviousness. It’s not a competition where caring, self reflection or any form of humanity counts. It simply rewards ignorance and baseness. That’s why Hong Kong Canto has been so strong for so long.

Anyway, history now shows my hunch was right. Just look at the result. Four of the 6 judges were hospitalised and one was so out of control he swiped a paring knife from a mango juice stall and attacked our whole team before they could even finish their main routine. And I knew, I just knew as soon as Jisweda Marcos was stabbed in the throat by that judge, that our chances of winning were pretty good. I just had that feeling. Jisweda’s a real trooper though, she’ll be back next year bigger, badder, louder and more inconsiderate I’m sure.’

The categories and results for the 2016 competition were as follows:


Hong Kong’s Lament


Team Cantonese vice captain Jimmy Wong

‘I dunno. It just seems everything is going wrong these days. Mainland China is pushing us around, rents are high, there’s lead in the water pipes, our city sucks. It’s all kind of taking the wind out of our sails. Maybe we feel weak somehow. I dunno. It’s shameful to be the first ever team to lose this championship. I lost face you know? I just don’t know what to say. There just wasn’t the same kind of spite and malice in our voice this year. It’s like we are looking over our shoulder or something. We just weren’t able to lash out consistently across the 10 disciplines with the right kind of vicious streak we usually have. I don’t know. They had that ‘put the child to sleep’ category this year. It was a new category. I mean, what is that? If an infant’s ear drums burst, how are we supposed to not put it to sleep? We lose points for our efforts. I feel like we got robbed. I just…I dunno…I’m speechless. We want to protest the result, actually. I mean…is it legal to have Filipino maids who are based in HK, represent the Philippines? They are here in our home base, stealing all our ideas, using us as inspiration. It’s not fair.’ – Jimmy Wong, vc, Team Cantonese.

Let’s hear it for Team Tagalog. Congratulations on a very well deserved victory. You must be very proud!


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99 Responses to Major Upset at 2016 WWLC Championships

  1. Anonymous says:

    Never leave house without my earphones!

  2. Gender X says:

    is vice captain Jimmy Wong a man or woman?

    Dudley, can you write something about androgyny in Hong Kong?

  3. Gweilo suck says:

    I’m qweilo suck, and I endorse this post.
    However, you forgot to mention the 3rd place runner up: cockney.

  4. Clint says:

    As I’m sure Dudley well knows, this sort of selfish, ignorant behavior is not exclusive to HK, it’s a world wide phenomenon. Well I say if you’ve got the gall to yell in public spaces like trains and buses with not the slightest consideration for other people, then be ready to be stared at because what you’re doing is you’re putting on a public spectacle. You’re making a spectacle of yourself, you’re drawing attention to yourself and should my phone or camera find its way pointed straight at your face filming, then you can be sure I’m putting the spectacle, you, on youtube. Morons.

  5. Buck says:

    No language has ever bothered me more than Cantonese. Tagalog has never really bothered me (unless one hangs around the Central on a Sunday, which I don’t).

    Do a test: go to any airport in the world, close your eyes, and listen. Ask yourself which language overpowers all others for sheer volume. It’s Cantonese. The Hong Kong flights ALWAYS have the nosiest crowd at the gate. Infact you don’t need to know your gate number. Just follow the noise. They win hands down in terms of volume, abrasiveness, and “in your face I dont give a fuck that you’re only a foot away” boorishness. Even the Mainlanders (that speak Mandarin) are blessed with a language that is less offensive than Cantonese. Now that’s saying something.

  6. Buck says:

    Dudley, you put a lot of effort into something that I think no one really cares about: Tagalog. I agree with Gender X: how about something on androgyny? Or…..cell phone Zombies? Door etiquette (hello, there are TWO doors, why are you all lining up behind just one of them)? Aspergers? Driving? Cyclists with the boom box (oh fuck I can’t for the life of me figure that one out)? The world’s shortest escalators? Supermarket samplers (keep circular queuing for a free bit of cheese yaaa)? Housing (too big an issue to cover in one thread, perhaps)? Public lover’s tiffs (facing each other, dead still and silent, with no eye contact)? I could go on…and on…but that would be a sign of Aspergers…..

  7. Apocalypse Chan says:

    Who cares about the local language!!!

    One thing I really can’t stand is those local zombie women poking other people’s eyes with their brollies in the most crowded of streets…

  8. Buck says:

    even worse, being poked by said umbrellas when it isn’t raining, or, under covered walkways.

    I invested in a golf umbrella. No one messes with it. Stand clear Honkies.

  9. Cat's Eye says:

    Funny and creative post, Dudley. Cantonese, Tagalog and Mandarin, to a lesser extent, add to the assault on the senses that is Hong Kong.

  10. Fuk Me says:

    Which of the following is the most common reply when you ask someone for help in Hong Kong?

    (A) “It can’t be done.”
    (B) “It’s not my responsibility”
    (C) “Ask someone else”
    (D) “It should not be done”
    (E) “What’s in it for me?”
    (F) Ask you a few dozen questions in return
    (G) Ask you to perform a favour first
    (H) Say yes but without any intention of helping at all
    (I) “Fuk Yu”

  11. Buck says:

    (J) “I don’t speak English” (this is increasingly the case in Asia’s World City)

  12. (k)

    ‘Hi, do you have any…’
    ‘But I didn’t even get the chan…’
    ‘Sorry no stock’

  13. Anonymous says:

    Or if, say, an electical supplier has run put of light bulbs / grocery out of milk and a customer asks if they have said item the owner will look at them like they are mad and wave them away with dismissive grunts. Vile Canto grunts.

  14. Gweilo suck says:

    Fucked a milf from Wah Fu estate today. Have fun on your junk boats, losers!

  15. Tom says:

    Really, Hong Kong sucks big time – retarded population, bad environment, nasty office politics, ugly women, and poor hygiene everywhere. This place is a city of retards in full-on no-holds-barred post colonial decline. Get out while you can!

  16. Yummy Mummy says:

    @Gweilo suck,

    milf from Wah Fu?? hope you don’t get STDs like HIV ….. nothing is free, you know..

    good luck..

  17. Gweilo suck says:

    Shows how much you know! These women have slept with 1 man in their lives, 2 tops. They get married as virgins, have kids then get divorced. Never even considered dating a gweilo. Push the right buttons and it’s a fucking hormone bomb. Don’t even need to talk much because of the language barrier.

  18. Anonymous says:

    lol this is brilliant

  19. Buck says:

    I really, really hate to agree with GS, but he is right. There is a huge market of MILFs out there. You can find them in the gym during office hours, trying to rediscover their pre-child bearing bodies. They are slightly down on self-esteem and highly flattered when a gwielo gives them a bit of attention.

    Stay clear of the LKF tarts. Get out of the central. Go for the blue ocean. Sometimes MILFs even cook afterwards.

  20. Gweilo suck says:

    Keep dreamin’, Buck. No canto = access denied.

  21. Dirk Diggler says:


    You have no fucking clue what you’re talking about. Most canto men are so busy roping mainland peasant hussies in Shenzhen they’re leaving the canto ranch completely abandoned with the gates wide open. MILF-banging in Hong Kong is like blasting fish in a fucking barrel with C4. I get the distinct impression Hong Kong men actually fuck for procreation. Are you even capable of ejaculating more than twice in a lifetime? I have serious doubts. By the time they hit their 30s most Hong Kong women have had sex fewer than a dozen times in their entire lives, especially the MILFs. Some of these broads still have the bodies of teenagers. And you can tell how fucking sexually frustrated they are.

    Besides, the beauty in Asia is…. they don’t fucking love you. They don’t want a relationship with you. They don’t even like you. They just want the cock. Nobody wants all that messy shit raising those hideous little mongrel mixed-race babies that have to have 16-years of private intl schools and grow up to be entitled little whiny cunts… Hongkie MILFS just want the white cock, some good old bukkake and maybe even some harmless bitch-slapping. I’ve fucked one of my property agents, a gal in my building, a gal I regularly encountered on daily commutes. All married. All lonely. All walking around with cobweb pussy and feeling cheated by life. All they want is some good old hard pumping cock and hot shot across the face once a month.

    Don’t listen to GS. He’s a fucking cunt. Half of married Hong Kong is ready willing and able to be fucked by bored gwailos. Canto MILFS don’t squeal like Japs, they’re not the money-grubbing ABC-BBC-CBC whores trying to score diamond rings or free cars from hedge fund types. They just want a good hard fucking. It doesn’t get any simpler than that.

  22. Gweilo suck says:

    Quite an essay you wrote there, Dirk. But only 3? Sheesh… oh and dh and mainlanders don’t count.

  23. Anon says:

    Dirk Diggler says:
    ‘Some of these broads still have the bodies of teenagers. ‘

    ‘Besides, the beauty in Asia is…. they don’t fucking love you. They don’t want a relationship with you. They don’t even like you. They just want the cock”.

    Couldn’t agree more. Asian women who take care of themselves tend to age far more slowly than westerrners. Even if you are only five years older it makes you look like Uncle Boner if you go out anywhere with them (or even worse grandpa Boner). Who the hell would want that?

  24. Give it to me says:

    Hong Kong singles ‘world’s most desperate’, suggests data from dating app

  25. DK says:

    @GS You’re just butthurt because fat balding middle age expat gweilos get more attention from local females than your insecure 90lb weakling androgynous local HK scumbag ass.

  26. Gweilo suck says:

    I’m sorry that you’re fat and balding, and that you’re too stupid to have noticed I’m white and not local.

  27. DK says:

    Right….a white fag who likes to suck cock. Hence your name gweilo suck.

  28. Deeper says:

    Dirk Diggler says:

    ‘Besides, the beauty in Asia is…. they don’t fucking love you. They don’t want a relationship with you. They don’t even like you. They just want the cock”.

    True they don’t love you and probably don’t even like you. But they do want your money and 24/7 attention. If you can give them a foreign passport, they want that too.

    Once they squeeze everything out of you, it’s time to move on (for them).

  29. SS says:

    Bragging about banging a MILF from Wah Fu?! Sounds like just another bottom feeding loser who gets ignored by women in his own country, so he has to move to Asia or South America where the women are brainwashed by white worship.

  30. Anon says:


    I think HK is GS”s own country. I’m sure he’ll be along to tell us one way or another. Especially if he’s forgotten to take his meds for Aspergers.

  31. Gweilo suck says:

    Just fucked the wah fu girl in my office. Can’t understand most of what she’s saying but she seems to be getting clingy.

  32. Gweilo suck says:

    Keeps sending me messages like this… 真的很想你
    Moving on to a younger model.

  33. tony m says:

    Dirk Diggler you are spot on. I loved your post. It was real pathos. Great work. You are a writer and one of truth.

    GS…lease keep posting, dont kill yourself yet because I like your pathetic lies and the blog needs a virgin fantasist freak to add colour to it. Also, Is your cock itching after after your disgusting encounter at Wa Fu or wherever? Likely not cos it was just a rancid fantasy rigyt? How does the office dream end…with you being caught and fired by your white boss? Ha Ha

  34. Gweilo suck says:

    Yes my cock is itching to fuck the 25 year old in my office that I’ve been hooking up with in a dark corner of the park most days after work. Loves deep kissing but has only fucked one guy in her life – her current boyfriend – so progress is slow. Broke some new ground tonight though. Slid my hand under her shirt and made a thorough survey of her firm little tits and eraser nipples. Then I placed her hand on my bulge. “Oh my God… that’s not asian size”. She told me she prefers doggy. I don’t give a fuck how we do it.
    Hong Kong does suck in the department of good places to take girls though. Fucking helper is home during the day, parks are full of old people and mosquitoes, and good hotels aren’t cheap.
    Wah Fu milf is on the back burner. She might have me over to her 300ft palace if she can ship the kids out for a few hours.
    I know you losers love this shit. Happy to share, it’s not like I can talk about it with the wife. Read and weep, fuck your wrinkly fat trash women, and fuck off home.
    Cmon out Dirk, tell us now how mid twenties hk girls with boyfriends are just itching for gweilo cock and are like shooting fish in a barrel. Because it’s just a fantasy in your little mind.
    I’ll be honest though, I aim for tier 2 women. No lower though. For reference, the hottest mainlanders are tier 3 and filipinas don’t even register. Tier 1 hk girls are a waste of time.

  35. Not-a-middle-age-bald-fat-disgusting-gweiloo says:

    I am so happy I shagged a MILF today, even though:

    (1) no men wanted to go near her before her marriage
    (2) her husband does not want to touch her now
    (3) no other men now want to pay any attention to her

  36. Gweilo suck says:

    So, you only find women hot if other men want her? You might be gay.

  37. Gweilo suck says:

    Just had a 2 hour suck and fuck-athon in wah fu. The fucking British government should be prosecuted for human rights abuses for putting people in housing like that. But who cares when a pair of silky legs are wrapped around your back while your cock is deep inside a beautiful woman. It’s like her whole objective in life is to be fucked by me. I love this place.

  38. I-am-not-a-scavenger says:

    I picked up some cigarette butts from the trash bin and smoke some. Taste great!

  39. Gweilo suck says:

    … afterwards, a delicious cheap lunch with the 25 year old. No English menus, no other dumb gweilos within a mile of the place. After work we went to the park for some heavy making out, shirt up, both tits in hand. I could almost smell her wet pussy. Fuck y’all gweilo scum.

  40. Anonymous says:

    Guilio Suck…you are are weirdo. I think you should see doctor and psychiatrist before you get arrested. You live in fantasy world of sick dreams and are sexist danger to women. Pervert.

    No wonder HK women like white guys.

  41. Gweilo suck says:

    The 25 year old and I often take the bus have a bit of fun on the top level right at the back. Note how in hk buses you are mostly left alone to do your own thing, without fat, smelly, yobbish or otherwise antisocial people being assholes. This is not the case in white countries of course, which is why I’m fucking good I don’t live in one any more. Just imagine having a nice night out with your girl and finding yourself in the middle of this:

    You fucking morons coming over here thinking you are in any way more civilised than the hk Chinese need to give your fucking heads a shake.

  42. Gweilo suck says:

    Anonymous, yes they do like white guys, but for the wrong reasons. I’m setting then straight, one pussy at a time.

  43. Gweilo suck says:

    Another trip to wah fu coming up, Google translate this motherfuckers: 与你爱爱是这一生中最美满的事

  44. Anon says:

    Asperger Boy’s (aka Gweilo Suck) latest persona “The office shagger’.

    The desperate fantasists latest effort to be like a westerner when he just doesn’t know how to.

  45. Gweilo suck says:

    The classy thing to do would be ignore me, but instead you just showed how jealous you are. As you should be. For gweilos HK is just an endless succession of incredible, beautiful, sexy women everywhere you go. Just imagine knowing that any one of them is within reach, approachable, potentially fuckable. Old, young, rich, poor, traditional, zero English… I get em all. That’s my hk. You can go to m&s and bitch about umbrellas. Have fun.
    Unfortunately I have not been able to convince the 25 yr old to come to an hourly hotel, so to progression on that front. Oh yeah that’s a great fantasy.

  46. Anon says:

    Asperger boy
    No say. you.utter.cockwomble..

  47. Gweilo suck says:

    Monday morning wah fu is a go, gonna buy a big box of condoms and leave it there this time. Last time she answered the door in a thin dress, just panties underneath…deep kissed me as soon as I had my shoes off… fuckin hot. And it was fucking hot with no AC. Let me know if you have any other questions. Lmao.

  48. Anon says:

    Have you ever thought of writing for Mills and Boon?

  49. Gweilo suck says:

    Fair point. Just started my own blog where I can offload my shit in more detail. Dudley, I’ve put a link to here in my first post, but I won’t put my url here unless you say it’s cool.

  50. Anon says:

    Good grief.

  51. Anakin says:

    @GS, please post some pics and videos of yourself!! 🙂

  52. Gweilo suck says:

    And the 25 year old has been fucked. Deeply.

  53. Anonymous says:

    This place blows turds. Beach is has medical waste on it. People so timid and nervous and stressed…yet racist wankers and bullies to south east Asians…they eat rare animals!

    Shit 2 year contract….621 days to go.

  54. Gweilo suck says:

    Yeah yeah we hear you, now fuck off back to where you came from if you think it’s so great.

  55. Gweilo suck says:

    Just posted a pic of the wah fu milf, for you losers to wank to.

  56. Hoover Bug Spray says:

    I was just wondering why TV here shows children’s cartoons after 8pm?

  57. Vachina says:

    Are you short G suck? You sound short. And lonely. Are you short and lonely G suck?

  58. Gweilo suck says:

    What I can tell you is I began last week with a trip to wah fu and fucked the hell out of the milf. Closed it out by fucking the sense out of the 25 year old in a hotel. What did you do last week, Vachina?

  59. Gweilo suck says:

    And as for my height, the only way I can do doogy with both of these chicks is when I stand on the floor.

  60. Ms Saigon says:

    I know who Gweilo suck actually is,,,,,:) and just for the record the above is all silly bullshit.

  61. Gweilos Suck says:

    Truth is hard for idiots to believe…

  62. Anon says:

    Not as hard as for you to remember to take your meds it would seem

  63. Ms Saigon says:

    Tell the truth, or someone will tell it for you…………

  64. Gweilos Suck says:

    The truth is, I’m a white guy living in hk, who hates dumb expats, and loves hk women. That’s all you’re gonna get.

  65. Anon says:

    Translation: “I’m a half chat loser who couldn’t cope with life in the west when I was at Cardiff polytechnic. I’ve had so many knock backs from western women I’m only confident approaching HK girls as I feel racially superior to them. The expats in HK (who I want to be like) wind me up so much that the OCD commenting I do on this blog has become a coping strategy”

  66. Gweilos Suck says:

    Since I’ve obviously upset you a great deal, would it make you feel better knowing I’m not “half chat”? Luckily for you, I’m pure white. Unluckily for you though, you’re a racist fuck.

  67. Anon says:

    Translation: ” I’m really upset reading this so because I’m a snowflake but expect to have everyone put up with my rascist comments (LKF sluts?) on previous posts. I’m going to play the race card.”

  68. Gweilos Suck says:

    LKF sluts? That must have really hit home for you. But no, it’s not racist. Do I think white culture sucks? Fucking right it does. Call it racist if you like, it’s a malleable word anyway. But thinking white people are better? Now that is truly despicable.

  69. Anon says:

    Translation “All my life I’ve had problems relating to westerners, especially women. My social awkwardness and self loathing lets me down every time”

  70. Gweilos Suck says:

    Hey, you’re half right this time!

  71. Ms Saigon says:

    People need to accept that the world is colorful.

  72. Gweilos Suck says:

    Is that all the “truth” you got?

  73. Are you a psychopath or sociopath? says:

    hey, Gweilos Suck, I think the MILFs you’ve been “dealing” with may in fact be sociopaths!!

  74. Ms Saigon says:

    Heh,,,I know who you are;) And the truth is you are a liar.

  75. Gweilos Suck says:

    Oh please, don’t keep us in suspense. I’ve only fucked one viet chick by the way, but that wasn’t in hk

  76. Ms Saigon says:

    Zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz boring.

  77. Gweilos Suck says:

    Yes you are very boring, and stupid too.

  78. Anon says:

    Looks like Gweilo suck’s finally given up on his home penis enlargement kit, and gone out to find some old poofter who will whack him off with tweezers for fifty bucks.

  79. Gweilos Suck says:

    Just fucked the 25 year old again. At one point her pussy was so wet I think she must have squirted.

  80. Anon says:


  81. Anon says:


  82. Anon says:

    Sex reassignment surgery for male-to-female involves reshaping the male genitals into a form with the appearance of, and, as far as possible, the function of female genitalia.

    Fascinating, can you tell us what it’s like GS? Did he, sorry I mean she, still have a hairy chest? How much did you pay him, sorry I mean her?

  83. Gweilo Suck says:

    3 anons in a row, nice. Is that just 3 jealous losers, or 1 very jealous massive loser? We’ll never know! And nobody gives a fuck.

  84. Gweilo Suck says:

    I am ashamed again. I am back on the meds. The truth is I hate myself for sucking mens cocks when I was a young Chinese student in Wales. I went so deep throat that I was able to lick their ass holes at the same time. But they got bored of me and dumped me socially. I only did it to try and make friends, I am not even fully gay, bi leaning to straight. Now I feel such anger and shame against whites that I troll blogs. I am sure that I will be trolling again when the meds wear off, but please believe that this is the real me. Sorry everyone for my stupidity and racism.

  85. Anon says:

    Just Interested not jealous! Don’t get so upset GS, its just a blog! I didn’t mean you any offense, I just wondered what its like to have sex with a man who has had his penis cut off in order to have a vagina instead. I should explain I’m writing a thesis on homosexual males hiding out in foreign countries suffering from Micropenis. My heart goes out to you instead, but there are treatments for this condition, such as insertion of a subcutaneous soft silicone implant under the penile skin, so there’s hope! Be strong GS, everyone likes you on this blog, there’s really no need to write all this nonsense about having sex with females all the time. What makes you thinks that doctors don’t read this blog too! You could find help, but you have to be honest. Its 2016! So many things are the norm these days, homosexuality and genetic malformation resulting in micropenis syndrome are nothing to hide. Just be grateful transsexuals with total removal of the testes, penis and scrotum are available in HK and willing to have sex with people who are suffering like you. You know in some other countries you’d have no sexual relief options at all. So chin up and keep smiling.

  86. Gweilos Suck says:

    My bad for not logging in @11:40. Since people really need to get a life.

  87. Gweilos Suck says:

    Correction, some people need to get a life. And seriously, who could write something like the post at 11:45 AM without first hand knowledge of gay sex or worse? Rurik is that you?

  88. Tempting transexual Thomas says:

    Wow Gweilos Suck you sound hot, you’ve three Anon’s and me jealous of you now too.

    Fancy meeting up sometime?

    You said earlier that you frequent Wah Fu? I’m from Wah Fu too in the estate. There’s only a few of our kind here, and I bet you’ve been doing it with that ugly old David in
    Wah Chun House. I’m far more horny and clean, and he’s only had his penis taken off, I’ve had the whole lot removed. We could have a lot of fun, and I’ll give you a special rate too cause you sound sexy;)

    Let me know, and I’ll post up a meeting place at the estate.

    Love, Tom

  89. Gweilos Suck says:

    Sure, get in touch!

  90. Tempting transexual Thomas says:

    Oh wow, yes how about 11pm this Friday or Saturday night? At Wah Fu Bus Terminus? Please let me know honestly.

    Love you, Tom

  91. Gweilos Suck says:

    Friday 11 works for me. Look for the white guy, should be easy to spot. Look forward to it.

  92. Tempting transexual Thomas says:

    See you then! Love Tom.

  93. tony m says:

    GS comes ‘clean’ at last! Can’t unread that stuff about him licking ass while deep throating. YUCK.

  94. Anonymous says:

    Gross yes, but funny. Seems that Chinese gays lick as much cornhole as Chinese girls! This post was about speech and ends up with this pervert describing licking Welsh ass. WTF!

  95. The real winner at 2016 WWLC Championships says:

    pages 219-220, Social Typhoon, “Chinese Characteristics”

    The habit of yelling to enforce command or criticism is in- grained in the Chinese, and appears to be ineradicable. To expostulate with another in an ordinary tone of voice, pausing at times to listen to his opponent’s reply, is to a Chinese almost a psychological impossibility. He must shout, he must interrupt, by a necessity as inexorable as that which leads a dog labouring under great excitement to bark.

    The Chinese have carried to a degree of perfection known only among Orientals the art of reviling. The moment that a quarrel begins abusive words of this sort are poured forth in a filthy stream to which nothing in the English language offers any parallel, and with a virulence and pertinacity suggestive of the fish-women of Billingsgate. The merest contact is often sufficient to elicit a torrent of this invective, as a touch induces the electric spark, and it is in constant and almost universal use by all classes and both sexes, always and every- where. It is a common complaint that women use even viler language than men, and that they continue it longer, justifying the aphorism that what Chinese women have lost in the compression of their feet seems to have been made up in the volubility of their tongues. Children just beginning to talk learn this abusive dialect from their parents and often employ it towards them, which is regarded as extremely amusing. The use of this language has become to the Chinese a kind of second nature. It is confined to no class of society. Literary graduates and officials of all ranks up to the very highest, when provoked, employ it as freely as their coolies.It is even used by common people on the street as a kind of bantering salutation, and as such is returned in kind.

  96. Gweilo suck says:

    But it’s cool when black people do it, right.

  97. Anonymous says:

    Chinese rant and shout…makes the diction more hideous.

  98. Anonymous says:

    The what? Who can even in their final glimpses of sanity claim that Cantonese sounds worse than Mandarin? The latter, at least when spoken by the standard issue mainlanders is like raping your ears with serrated jackhammers. Being trapped in a bus full of HK seniors or pinned down in the sunday picnic of the Filipinas is not in the same ballpark in any possible measure. It does not either help much that the mainlanders tend to add another +20dB to their shouting because as it more than often seems in the mainland, making more noise is believed to make more progress. If only someone told them it might not always be that simple.

  99. Cunty Tang says:

    Cantonese is ugly. But sometimes westerner is surprised at my name and laugh before I speak much, only say me name. Very strange?.

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