Taking the Piss out of Starbucks

…might be a good idea to take the fecal matter out too…


You know, I don’t know what it is about Hong Kong, but the locals don’t really seem to mind hanging out in toilets. They’ll happily take their lunch box in there and rinse it out from the same tap where Mr Fong and 10 other dim sum defecating demons just washed their shit smeared digits. They’ll stand for minutes at a time splashing dubious amounts of potentially deadly water all over their face to freshen up. They’ll stand side by side with Mr Fang, washing their lunch box, while Fang splashes the contaminated water from his hands all over the walls, floor, mirror, sink, tap, soap dispenser and hard to locate paper towel holder. I have no idea what goes on in the ladies…but Hong Kong males seem to favour the public toilet as a place to spend 30 to 40 minutes preening themselves, primping themselves…just hanging out…nostrils full of shit.

The scene of thousands of crimes

The scene of thousands of crimes

There’s always someone shitting in Hong Kong…and the small, skanky Starbucks shitter in the Bank of China Tower is no exception. While it is alarming that Starbucks source their coffee water from this fecal harbouring filth hole…it’s not surprising. If Starbucks does it, you can bet there’s few other food and drink establishments in Hong Kong that don’t. Can you imagine what they do at Fairwood, Cafe De Coral or the Spaghetti House? The word ‘horrific’ comes to mind. I don’t even want to think about what goes on at your average yum cha restaurant.

The process: Step 1...make sure the coast is clear...Step 2: fill her up...Step 3: get back to base...Step 4: make delicious coffee

The process: Step 1…make sure the coast is clear…Step 2: fill her up…Step 3: get back to base…Step 4: make delicious coffee

You always get the feeling at Hong Kong food and drink businesses that the line between health and savage stomach crippling diarrhea induced death is paper thin. Hong Kong’s only about half a step ahead when it comes to sanitation and hygiene. Behind every shop front, around every corner…there’s a whole world of urine, shit and disease waiting for its chance to fuck…you…up.



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4 Responses to Taking the Piss out of Starbucks

  1. JRM says:

    Awesome my wife gets her coffee from that Starbucks … Time to go to the hospital to see what flavor hepatitis she picked up…

  2. HKBabe says:

    Wow, gross, and that is subject to licensing, so the Authority knows where the water comes from but think it perfectly okay….

  3. Turnipboy says:

    The only thing easier than getting dysentery if you’re a hongkie is getting a Canadian, Australian, or British passport, which they seem to handout with every pound of fish from the wet market. “Earn you money here, then retire elsewhere and bludge of their social system when you need it” seems to be the mantra.

  4. Anonymous says:

    I’ve been visiting your blog for a couple of weeks now and I have to say your work is really interesting. Might have raised eyebrows but nothing wrong with being blunt. Who are you? I wonder..

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