I Hate You Park ‘n Shop

…PARK ‘N SHOP MASSACRE

Police try to subdue disgruntled Park ‘n Shopper

If ever there’s going to be a place where a man goes bezerk with guns in Hong Kong and mows down 60 people before turning the gun on himself…it’s going to be in Park ‘n Shop. Someone’s going to storm that place one day, armed to the teeth and open fire with machine guns, grenades and nail bombs. Before he goes down, either in a hail of police gunfire or by his own hand, he’s going to have taken command of the Park & Shop store announcement microphone and read out a list of demands and instructions. I would imagine it would go something like this:

Attention shoppers and shopkeepers. Hi. If my demands are not met there will be more bloodshed. These are my demands…

1. Any people caught saving line positions in multiple lines so that they may improve their waiting time by 20 or 30 seconds should be immediately banned from the store for life.

2. Anybody caught staring rudely into another person’s shopping trolley, especially if they have to crane their neck, lean over, around or forward to get a good look, for more than 1-2 seconds should be permanently banned and savagely pistol whipped with shopping baskets..

3. Anybody who leaves their shopping trolley in a ridiculous or lazy location, especially near the checkouts, blocking or obstructing other shoppers, should be banned from shopping and then hired as a trolley gopher who gets paid in handfuls of magic beans.

There’s evidence for about 40 bans in this picture alone.

…dear…

…oh dear

4. Anybody who slaps an orange, watermelon, apple…or any other fruit more than say…30 times to test its ripeness, should be pelted with off fruit (straight off the P&S shelves) and banned from the store for life.

5. People who, when in the aisle, do not attempt to or who seem to outright refuse to move their shopping trolley so that other shoppers can get through should be shin rammed and then banned.

6. People who line up to buy one can of Pocari Sweat with a credit card or ATM card should have their cards cut up with scissors and never allowed back in the shop again.

7. People who, having paid for all their items, stand at the end of the checkout counter and leisurely read their receipt or stand and count forty 10 cent pieces three times over, play with their phone or anything else that gets in the way of the next person in line should be shown the door and never let back in.

shudder

8. Any person who thinks it’s ok to stand in an aisle and conduct a lengthy, loud phone call that obstructs other people from reaching items on the shelf should be thrown physically out of the shop and have their phone smashed.

9. Shoppers who push you or elbow you because they are afraid they will miss out on something should be fucking banned.

10. People who double their pace from 5-10 meters out and try to beat you into a checkout line to save one spot should be told to ‘get the fuck out of the shop’.

11. Shopkeepers, especially in the fruit section, who scream at the top of their lungs about bullshit price savings and how much the durians stink this season…should be sacked. Don’t hawk food in a supermarket.

.

12. Checkout operators who seem to have forgotten they live in Hong Kong…it’s a FAST city you know…and scan and pack items like they are brain damaged or underwater should be sacked.

13. People who pay by placing coins onto the surface of the checkout counter, causing the checkout person to have to try to pick them up (agonizingly slowly), one by one, should be told to never, ever bother coming back.

14. Morons who think it’s ok to throw their used tissues into the bottom of shopping baskets or trolleys should be taken somewhere for severe re-education.

The plastic bag might come in handy, thanks! But…the used tissue…I don’t know…that seems a bit unhygienic…

…again…used snot rag in the old basket…is this a Chinese custom?

…I think it might be…

15. People in line behind you who can’t stop tapping you in the back or leg with their trolley, arm or bag should be pushed out of the shop and body-slammed into a shopping trolley.

16. People who cough and sneeze openly, without remorse or awareness that it could be deemed a hygiene problem, should be fucking banned.

17. Shoppers who lose control during holiday periods like Christmas or Chinese New Year by yelling louder, moving with even less consideration for others than usual, gnashing their teeth or clawing at shelves in a general frenzy should be quietly told to ‘get out’.

18. Mothers or fathers who ssssssssssssssscream at their sssssssssssssssssscreaming kids…should be stunned somehow and dragged out of the shop.

Fish that swim upside down should be half price

I want to hear old ladies scream DISCOUNT and I want that fish hacked to the bone and bled in front of everyone. I want to see its tiny heart beat in a pointless struggle for life. Then I want to buy some undersize crabs, paw at meat chunks and panic at the thought of someone taking the last piece of broccoli.

19. Individuals who abuse express checkout lines should be told more often than they are, to get their grossly stacked trolley the fuck out of the 15 item or less express line and punched in the spine. Then banned.

20. Customers who pull out reams of vouchers which have to be painstakingly checked by multiple staff members should be told to please leave without making a fuss. Then both staff and customer should be sent somewhere to be impressed upon that Hong Kong is a FAST paced city and we won’t stand for that kind of shit here…especially when there’s 400 people waiting in line.

21. This goes without saying, but I’m going to say it anyway…anyone in the store who makes excessive noise should be life banned. That includes trolley stacking smashing staff, overly loud store announcements, staff who yell from checkout 1 over to checkout 9, supermarket hawking, people on mobile phones, any and all screaming and yelling.

22. This…you shouldn’t be able to fondle more than 7 pieces of meat in a row…even with tongs…

.

23. People who, when you are standing in line, want to cut in and pass through so they can get to the ‘candy rack’ in front of the checkout should be led away and stoned with cans of dolphin safe tuna.

24. Bans for people who stand in front of shelves for more than about 5 minutes trying to decide what item to buy…blocking access to that part of the shelf for other people.

25. Bans for people who stand together in the aisle chatting or catching up on old times…without the slightest consideration that there may be other people in the shop with them who may want to get by.

26. Idiots who bash their way back into the checkout person’s attention by screaming and holding a receipt outstretched, wanting to question it in some way…while the checkout person is already busy talking to or dealing with another customer…should be thrown so far from the store that they’ll never find their way back…

…well…I think that’s about it.

I think my demands are more than fair. You know…Park ‘n Shop could be a great, great supermarket if people jus…

…………….shattering glass…………..gun fire……….explosions……..tear gas…..screaming…..flying trolleys…water canons…momentary silence.

Scores of police descend on Park ‘n Shop lunatic

.

Anyway, I think that’s a little bit how the scene would unfold. The next day in the paper we’d probably see the headline…

MAN GOES BEZERK IN PARK N SHOP

 …somewhere in the article it’ll say…’at this stage no motive has been established…investigators are baffled’

Enter at your own risk

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45 Responses to I Hate You Park ‘n Shop

  1. Cletus says:

    To hell with the 10 commandments, these are 26 rules that MUST BE TAUGHT in Hong Kong! For fucks sake!

  2. Without doubt. Shoppers should be made to sign a 26 point contract before they enter the shop

  3. ChrisZ78 says:

    I pity all your poor guys who are apparently stuck in HK though they hate it so much. Why don’t you just move to another spot on this (or another) planet that suits you better, and make some space for those who turn green with envy at the very mention of the wonderful city you are allowed to spend your life in? You’re in HONG KONG, for G*d’s sake, the best place you can be, and you’ve already more than your share of good luck in your lives – what’s wrong with your hearts that you are still so grumpy?!

  4. Cletus says:

    @ ChrisZ78: None of us are ‘stuck’ here in Hong Kong, and we are well aware of that fact. We all have our own reasons for being in HK, whether it be to earn money, business interests, false illusions, family concerns, or whatever. But what we, as westerners, are willing to do, is show some BACKBONE and point things out when they are so obviously fucked up. That is one of the main differences between westerners and Hong Kong people: the willingness to go against the grain, point out inconsistencies, and call out bullshit when we spot it. WE are the ones who have adapted to YOUR way of life here, but we are still able to have problems with it, and we have the balls to point it out, not hide from it. Have you noticed that there is a Chinatown or a heavily Chinese section of almost every major city in the world? Why is that, do you think? I personally know dozens of families who have been living in western countries for decades and still can’t speak English. Why doesn’t it work the other way around. Why isn’t there an ‘Australiatown’ or a ‘Canadatown’ or a ‘UKland’ in Hong Kong or other Asian cities. Oh, that’s right, it’s because we are able to ADAPT to the new places we migrate to, not build these weird pseudo-communities to hide in and make it feel like we are still in HK. Maybe we should go over to a place like Vancouver (Hong-couver) and tell all the people in the Chinatown to ‘Quit acting Chinese! Learn to love the beautiful place you are in! Embrace Canada! Quit bitching about the snow and the cold and the French language, and all this ‘weird, blue sky’. Leave if you can’t!’. Those people are there in Canada (or wherever) ACTING Chinese. We are here in Hong Kong ACTING like westerners. Don’t preach to us that we cannot have our own opinions until you get your own house in order! As for your comment of ‘You’re in HONG KONG, for G*d’s sake, the best place you can be’, please allow me to retort. I feel sorry for anyone who says that it is anything close to the ‘best’ place that ANYONE can be. It isn’t. It’s small, dirty, overcrowded, stinky, polluted (the biggest problem of all, hands down), rude, loud, lacking in culture and entertainment, and a general cesspool. Does it have its own redeeming qualities? Certainly. There are a great many things that I like and, yes, even LOVE about Hong Kong, but they do not belong in a blog like this. There is nothing ‘wrong with out hearts’ as you say. We are simply strong, confident, fearless people who are not sheep. We call bullshit when we see it. We don’t pretend that problems don’t exist. We don’t hide ourselves away in little communities with other people of our home countries. We think. We analyze. We CRITIQUE.

  5. Anonymous says:

    Well said Cletus. If we couldn’t laugh we’d cry.

  6. Anonymous says:

    Well said Cletus.

  7. Bastard says:

    Wow, you are one of the most racist people I have ever read on a blog. You even have the balls to think you are somehow “enlightened” just because you are accustomed to a so-called “higher way of living”. I wish you the very worst.

  8. That’s the spirit! This blog needs more agitators like you, Bastard.

  9. weszup says:

    Wow, this one got ugly. Cletus, don’t ever give up standing against people the most close minded society on earth (as far as I can tell). Those who are disagreeing with you are the A type Hong Kong person who think they are perfect and will fight to the death to defend their position without examples to back themselves up – although I shouldn’t say fight to the death because if you confronted them in person they would turn their head to the side to avoid eye contact and squirm away. There are people in this phlegm-scape who understand your position so don’t feel alone or trapped. I came here as a student simply for the experience and could never have imagined the level of depravity. I hope you can find like I have the good and honorable people who are mixed in with the robots programmed as infants.

  10. Anonymous says:

    Cletus says:
    June 28, 2011 at 11:43 am
    @ ChrisZ78: None of us are ‘stuck’ here in Hong Kong (YES YOU ARE YOU LOW LIFE BITCH), and we are well aware of that fact. We all have our own reasons for being in HK, whether it be to earn money, business interests, false illusions, family concerns, or whatever. But what we, as westerners, are willing to do, is show some BACKBONE and point things out when they are so obviously fucked up (YOU AS A FUCKED UP PERSON ARE APART OF THIS HOLE). That is one of the main differences between westerners and Hong Kong people: the willingness to go against the grain, point out inconsistencies, and call out bullshit when we spot it. WE are the ones who have adapted to YOUR way of life here (YOU HAVE A CHOICE MAN!), but we are still able to have problems with it, and we have the balls (YOU DO?) to point it out, not hide from it. Have you noticed that there is a Chinatown or a heavily Chinese section of almost every major city in the world? Why is that, do you think? (I CAN TELL YOU WHY: COZ MANY PEOPLE OUT THERE STILL SIMPLY APPRECIATE THE CHINESE CULTURE UNLIKE AN IGNORANT PERSON LIKE YOU) I personally know dozens of families who have been living in western countries for decades and still can’t speak English (OH CAN YOU SPEAK CHINESE WHILE YOU ARE LIVING THERE?). Why doesn’t it work the other way around. Why isn’t there an ‘Australiatown’ or a ‘Canadatown’ or a ‘UKland’ in Hong Kong or other Asian cities (DO YOU OWN RESEARCH… YOU SIMPLY DO NOT NEED ALL THESE TOWNS YOU CAN STILL BUY WHATEVER YOU NEED THERE IMPORTED FROM AUSTRALIA, CANADA AND UK). Oh, that’s right, it’s because we are able to ADAPT to the new places we migrate to, not build these weird pseudo-communities to hide in and make it feel like we are still in HK. Maybe we should go over to a place like Vancouver (Hong-couver) and tell all the people in the Chinatown to ‘Quit acting Chinese! Learn to love the beautiful place you are in! Embrace Canada (YES THEY DO!!! AS A MATTER OF FACT, SOME CHINESE HAVE BEEN THERE GENERATIONS AFTER GENERATIONS)! Quit bitching about the snow and the cold and the French language, and all this ‘weird, blue sky’. Leave if you can’t!’ (JUST LIKE WHAT YOU NEED TO DO… LEAVE HONG KONG!!!!!). Those people are there in Canada (or wherever) ACTING Chinese. We are here in Hong Kong ACTING like westerners (YEAH FUCKED UP PEOPLE LIKE YOU! BRING ALL THESE RACIST BULLSHIT THERE). Don’t preach to us that we cannot have our own opinions (JUST LIKE i SHOUT OUT MINE) until you get your own house in order! As for your comment of ‘You’re in HONG KONG, for G*d’s sake, the best place you can be’, please allow me to retort . I feel sorry for anyone who says that it is anything close to the ‘best’ place that ANYONE can be. It isn’t. It’s small, dirty, overcrowded, stinky, polluted (the biggest problem of all, hands down), rude, loud, lacking in culture and entertainment, and a general cesspool. (SO WHY ARE YOU STILL THERE? LEAVE…. LEAVE… LEAVE…) Does it have its own redeeming qualities? Certainly. There are a great many things that I like and, yes, even LOVE about Hong Kong, but they do not belong in a blog like this (TELL ME SOMETHING I DONT KNOW!!). There is nothing ‘wrong with out hearts’ as you say. We are simply strong, confident, fearless people who are not sheep (YEAH YOU ARE A PUSSY). We call bullshit when we see it. We don’t pretend that problems don’t exist (AGAIN… YOU HAVE A CHOICE TO GET THE FUCK OUT). We don’t hide ourselves away in little communities with other people of our home countries. We think. We analyze. We CRITIQUE (I THINK. I ANALYZE, I CRITIQUE TOO).

    PEOPLE STUPID LIKE YOU DESTROY THE WHOLE WORLD… ALL YOU GUYS DO LIKE TO COME TO ASIAN COUNTRIES FOR YOUNG KIDS… DISGUSTING DOUCHEBAG…

  11. Cletus says:

    @Anonymous poster above:

    First off, LOL.

    Secondly, you missed the meaning of my post completely, which isn’t surprising actually. You accuse me of being racist, spreading hate, being a douchebag, and basically tell me to get the fuck out of Hong Kong. Classy! Or should I say CLASSY? Most of your CAPS responses to some of my points are incomprehensible, and some are quite laughable. But the ones that I was able to decipher and deserve a response will follow below.

    Throughout your reply, you attack me with name-calling. You call me ‘low-life bitch’, ‘fucked up person’, ‘ignorant’, ‘douchebag’ etc. Wow, great debating skills. I haven’t uttered one racist comment, slur, or derogatory thing at you or your people. In fact, it’s not in my nature to do so. What do I actually do? I call out bullshit. I’ve been living in Asia long enough (going on 9 years) to know it when I smell it. And friend, the air is ripe on HK. All I am doing is pointing it out. If that bursts your bubble, I’m sorry, but it is something you need to hear. But hurling pathetic insults back at me like that just comes off as very lame. You can do better!

    Another thing you attack me with is saying that I can’t appreciate Chinese culture. Hmm, is that so? I’ve visited dozens of temples, visited numerous ancestral villages, have been invited into friends’ (HK people) homes for holidays, eaten dozens of traditional meals, participated and PERFORMED in festivals in Hong Kong, but NO, I couldn’t appreciate Chinese culture. I work with HK people every day, some of my best friends are from HK, and some of my favorite shops, bars, clubs, and venues happen to be in HK. Oh, did I mention that I have traveled in mainland China to many provinces? Have I told you I’ve spent time in Beijing, Shanghai, Gengzhou, Kunming, Xiamen, Hunan, Sichuan, and dozens of other places? Did I tell you that I’ve walked on the Great Wall in THREE different spots, for miles at a time? That I’ve been to the Shaolin Temple? Did I tell you that my ex-girlfriend is from Shenzhen? Geez, I wonder if YOU have done any of those things in Mainland China? The answer is probably “no”! I know most people in HK almost NEVER go to Mainland CHina. They think they are so much better and that Shenzhen is ‘too dangerous’ of a place to go. Hmmmm, sounds like maybe YOU can’t appreciate Chinese culture, eh matey?

    The last thing I will laugh at here is how you immediately say “Go home! Leave HK!” etc. How very charitable of you! What a nice piece of advice! Are you serious? Just curious, are you a Christian? I doubt you’d actually tell me, but if you are you’d really better take a look at your beliefs and values. The first thing you do when someone tries to point out obvious things is to tell them to GTFO of your country? Hahaha. That’s not ‘what Jesus would do’! Even if you are not a Christian, you still sound like an asshole. What do you think it would be like if every country just told everyone who speaks to fuck off? The government doesn’t control our speech, we have the right to voice out opinions. And that, my friend, is what we are doing here: VOICING OPINIONS. We are not spewing hatred or racism, we are pointing out shit that we see every day. We’re talking about shit that annoys us. We’re talking about shit that looks backwards to us. We are observing the apparent lack of humanity in people sometimes. Be a man, open your eyes, and just realize that just because people tell you that you live in paradise, you don’t. You’re far from it my friend.

    Your friend,

    Cletus

  12. Kelvin says:

    I personally respect the freedom of speech in Hong Kong, however, if you are disappointed with all those “bad behaviors”, ya, sure, you can type out a blog like this criticizing how pathetic Hong Kongers are and how much you hate it, but at last, what can you do? Ok, I will tell you.. the answer is, DEAL WITH IT. Unless you have the guts to yell all your points out in a Park n Shop, telling all those people to get the fuck out, stop acting like monkeys and be “civilized” (According to your definition of the word “civilize”).
    Sure Hong Kong might not be the cleanest place on earth, but I CAN GUARANTEE that it is WAY CLEANER than where I am living now, a highly developed western “civilized” country, UNITED KINGDOM. I am not going to start criticizing how terrible it is to live here. (HMM… extremely loud people yelling and screaming ON THE STREET and ON THE TRAIN, YES ON THE TRAIN WHEN PEOPLE ARE SLEEPING, cig butts, water bottles, food wrappings, food, and any other garbage you can think of on the street, people vomiting and peeing everywhere and yes, literally everywhere especially on weekends, random people trying to smoke your “smoked” cig DISGUSTING, ONE THING I HATE THE MOST IS THAT THE CIVILIZED PEOPLE LOVE TO SCREAM NO MATTER HOW LATE IT IS FROM 2AM – 4AM.) Honestly saying, its worse than mainland Chinese who are, to me already, extremely rude and noisy + uncountable issues. But they are still developing. SO, you shared your horrible experience living in Hong Kong, and I shared my terrible experience living here in a civilized western country.

  13. It’s just a bit of fun Kelvin…don’t take it so seriously. And stop trying to passively imply that Hong Kong doesn’t suck when it does.

  14. yanti says:

    1 have been in hongkong for 9 years but so far with park n shop supermarket ,, recently they open a branch in jordan ,, and 1 was there to buy thing but the service is veri DISSAPOINTING ,, very regret about that ,,, many shop in hongkong can give very good service ,, so guys ,, think before we go in ,, chose the right choice,, happy shopping ,,,,,,,,,,

  15. Jo says:

    My wife recently asked a Park ‘n Shop “Customer Service Officer” in the bakery if she could have just one loaf of bread instead of the two that were already bagged. The “Customer Service Officer” didn’t look happy about it but proceeded to take one of the loaves out of the bag and hand the remaining loaf to my wife. Just before my wife was about to thank her for her help she threw the perfectly good other loaf into a rubbish bin. We couldn’t believe the waste. I wanted to give our loaf back but my wife argued she’d probably throw that one as well. On the way home I couldn’t help but think of all the hungry people who would have been grateful for that loaf of bread.

  16. setan jeep says:

    bunch of assholes with nothing better to do…

  17. Johnny says:

    I can’t believe you guys ain’t shopping on line…None of that BS would exist…

  18. Anonymous says:

    Cletus, you people have adapted? Really? LOL YOU DON’T GET TO COMPLAIN ABOUT THOSE CHINESE PEOPLE OVERSEAS WHO DONT KNOW HOW TO SPEAK ENGLISH AFTER LEAVING THERE FOR A LONG TIME. As if westerners ever bother to learn the local language when they’re overseas! Most westerners send their kids to international schools and most expat kids who grew up in HK don’t even speak a word of Cantonese and are ridiculously proud of it. Not a hint of shame when confessing! Plus I’ve heard so many westerners complain here in HK about local people not being able to communicate in English well enough. I mean, does that even make sense? Go back to your English speaking motherland if that’s your gripe! Problem solved!

  19. Don Quixote. says:

    All this just makes a simple point, this city is full of arrogant, very sad and small minded people.
    Hong Kong is small… way too small, too crowded, too smelly. But all this things wont matter at all if Hong Kongers where more friendly, but as they are Chinese they tend to be despotic. For us western people, Hong Kong is just boring. I do feel bad to have gamble my life into coming to this place; wasted my time and my energy, the only thing that keeps me going is to know im leaving this city. The problem is that this is not a country that you can travel and meet all of it wonders the problem is that Hong Kong is the bastard child of England, small and lost with no real connection to mother China, only monetary interests. I pity looking at this poor lambs waving the flag of england as if the british where to return; Pity. Hong Kong people are really lost, they should just place the face of Mao and a peoples square or fight for real independence, but not one thing not the other. Just sad faces and western people caught in this problem.

  20. Peter says:

    Although I agree with some of your general points Cletus, you article is so poorly written and so completely lacking in humour that I end up simply strongly disliking you.

    I have been here a year and have no connection whatsoever to Hong Kong, and therefore no pre-programmed bias. I have taken it as it comes. I love some bits, hate others. I’m sure that would be the same anywhere I was in the world. I do like reading humorous and saitirical blogs about the flaws of Hong Kong but really you just come across as a pathetic, sad and, dare I say it, racist little man.

    Also, are you joking – no “Australiatown or Canadatown or UKland in Hong Kong”?! The whole of Hong Kong island is all of the above! Are you really telling me LKF or Soho are “Chinese” in any way.

    If you haven’t got the natural humour to be able to poke fun at something and make people laugh with you, you shouldn’t really be writing stuff like this. Good satire needs charm to pull it off.

  21. Hate says:

    Time to report MORE BAD behaviour by PArk N Shop Hong Kong. So many times they advertise discount at the shelf but then their cash register conveniently was not updated with the lower price. They cheat Hong Kong by the millions every year!!

  22. Keith says:

    There’s lot’s of space for improvement in supermarkets here. The one supermarket called Taste, has an upper floor and a lower floor. You can take groceries from the upper floor down and pay downstairs at the cashier, but the upper floor cashier would not accept anything from downstairs (for an unknown reason). So, if you wanted to buy certain groceries available on the upper floor and have things to buy downstairs, you need to queue up twice – for the exact same supermarket (hope they’ll fix this someday).
    Then the worst thing is the “refrigerated” beers in a broken refrigerator. What’s the purpose of keeping that broken fridge for this long?
    Lastly what the F is all the inconsistency in packing stuff (the cashier) about? Do I really need to tell you to wrap the thin-foiled curry meal into another plastic when the sauce is already dropping? While some cashiers wrap vacuum packed cheese in an extra plastic bag for no reason.

    I found the right blog. What the fuck is wrong with this place. Why do cabs think they can just simply ignore you?
    Why the fuck does everything need to be noisy, including the MTR gates with your annoying beeps, constant voice announcements/don’t walk hold the handrail messages, extremely annoying sound coming out from the street crossings (handicapped people would probably not mind a less irritating sound), the fucking heavy coins (are you still in the Stone Age? The 5 dollar and 2 dollar coins), your obsession with shopping malls in complete excess (this will backfire one day surely), your fucking cigarette habits blowing straight into a stranger’s face, your annoying conversation loudness like you are in a concert, constantly, I could still go on. Another time.

  23. HK stands for Hongkongers (are) Kittenshit says:

    U R MY HERO!!!!!!!

  24. HK stands for Hongkongers (are) Kittenshit says:

    Cletus u r my hero!!! (i had to post this twice! Haha). And ChrisZ78, why do your beloved country hire all these expats? Because your people can’t do jack shit! Useless.

  25. 15wongnh1 says:

    BEST. BLOG POST. EVER!

    As for the machine guns, he’ll be storming in with his airsoft Vector and UZI, along with two Berettas so he can John Woo cashiers in the face.

  26. Anonymous says:

    Your father should have pulled out.

  27. Wesley Brown says:

    I’m an ex pat and I personally love hk. So some of the people are rude, some are loud and some are boisterous. But you know what, it’s better here than in the US or UK. People are hardworking, the food is amazing and fresh and the festivals are amazing. Oh and your father should have kneed your mother in the abdomen a few times when he found out she was pregnant with you 🙂 . That or thrown her down a set of escalators that are travelling in an upwards direction.

  28. Anonymous says:

    Well speaking as a US expat here: yes, some wet markets has fresh food. But Wellcome does not and when it might the prices are usually bad. The meat here is unsafe. No one I know — Chinese or otherwise — is buying “Made in China” meat products at the supermarket, hence the expensive NZ beef, etc. Hardworking? Well, they certainly LOOK hard working don’t they? That whole “let’s stay past 6 thing and stare at our computers since the boss is in the office”-thing is awfully effective. Personally I’d trade them for a lazy American ’cause at least the American might not need hand-holding on the simplest of tasks.
    OH WAIT! You are a member of the 50 Cent Party and a Mainland Commie posing as an “ex pat” — it’s so delightful that you misspell the very word and claim to be one! No US expat uses the word “abdomen” and not “stomach” in such a context. The awkwardly constructed final session also reveals that you are a Chinaman, perhaps a real Chinaman from the motherland serving the CCP. I’m sure to your Mainlander ass, the food here in HK is wonderfully fresh indeed. At least the baby formula isn’t full of poison…that is when there is any in the shops that the Commie Mainlanders haven’t snatched up already!
    You know? The only thing worse than a local is a Commie Mainlander!

  29. Chris G says:

    Ex pats have an inflated opinion of HK and of their own entitlement.
    If they had to live with a low or middle bracket income their opinions on HK would change quicker than a gold diggers wink. In any case most of them are total bell ends wherever they live.

  30. Wesley Brown says:

    Did I say I was a skanky yank? I’m from Britain you twatface Knobhead! I’m no obese burger stuffing yank. Where 90 percent of the population can’t even get out of their beds as they’re so fucking lardy and jabba da hut like.

  31. Wesley Brown says:

    & if you don’t like it here, why exactly don’t you just fuck off back? Instead of moan about it?
    Ignorance is bliss! And your mum really should have thrown herself down a mine shaft or stuck a knitting needle up her cunt… Or fanny as we Brits call it….
    And Im glad you pointed out that yanks are lazy… They can’t even spell.. Colour is spelt as so, cot color and aluminium… Can you say aluminium? It has a I in it… Fucking idiot….

  32. Anonymous says:

    Shit Wesley…with your vicious lashing out and apparent lack of humour it’s easy to see why you like Hong Kong so much. You must fit in a treat.

  33. Anonymous says:

    You know the only thing worse than the locals, the Commies, the fat Americans in HK? The Brits who walk around like they still own the place. Wesley, I still say you’re a fake shill account being run by a Commie back in the Mainland ’cause only an idiot would come to this site and defend the city. The only possible way to enjoy this city is if you make so much money that you never have to deal with the locals, use the MTR, or venture out to buy your own groceries at Wellcome. But then again you Brits are all so drunk here that it’s a miracle you can stand. I can’t remember the last Brit man I saw that didn’t have a pint in his hand.
    Brit or Commie Chinese or local cretin: the point is the same, isn’t it?
    Only an idiot comes to to this site to defend Hong Kong.
    And only an idiot defends Hong Kong. Festivals? What fucking festivals? The flower show? Clockenflap? What? You know this term FILTH? Failed In London Try Hong Kong?
    It’s pretty fucking apt, ain’t it MATE!?!
    Sod off back to pier 3, grab your pint while wearing your white shirt, suit jacket and suit pants, amble down to the ferry at the last second, and get home to your spoiled Discovery Bay wife.

  34. Le vent se lève il faut tenter de vivre says:

    You english can’t cook, your women looks like cheap overweight whores, what’s up with showing everything they can when they’re so fat and off putting ? Give me a fucking break ever heard of elegance ? class ? Beer marathons on the MTR ? Get fucked, the lot of you, your country is turning into a fucking sewer and you don’t deserve better.

    You people are repulsive, The old overweight farts on lockhart road with the teenage whores, most of them are british, sure I guess you find it wonderful here ! Probably one of the few places in the world where you can get a woman that isn’t a fat disgusting alcoholic skank.

  35. Chris G says:

    See what I mean about expats being total bell ends? Three of them arguing about whose country of origin is the best despite leaving them to go and live somewhere else.

  36. Le vent se lève il faut tenter de vivre says:

    Guilty as charged ! Trolling the trolls

  37. Anonymous says:

    Exactly! Who cares what’s worst, the US or UK? The point remains that Hong Kong sucks in so many ways. The people and city are awful. That’s what we’re all here to celebrate, isn’t it?

  38. Anonymous says:

    *Grab popcorn, beer and watch the French, Brits and Uncle Sam slice each other’s throat*.

    Back to the topic, I just love when I see an airhead using a credit card to pay for coke in 711. It happens everywhere. “For fuck sake man! Don’t you know you can use a damn octopus card, or that old thing called cash for that?” And then the cunt will get the pin number wrong… AAAHHHHH!!!

  39. Pete says:

    how about the dicks that keep going round in circles to get multiple free samples of cheese (or some other shit) on a toothpick.

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